False cases by women on men kept on increasing – they started from 498A, flourished after DV Act was passed in 2005, and unmarried women used ‘technical rape’; after 498A arrests became difficult due to SC judgment of Jul 2014, some married women quickly switched over to IPC 377 (unnatural sex) and even IPC 354 (outraging modesty of woman) on father-in-law or brother-in-law. Suicide of husbands kept increasing. 21st century is here in full force!
Some people think all this was predicted by some wise guy 5500 years back, but he didn’t tell the ways on how to fight these cases which will happen in 21st century, so here we are making a humble attempt to do the same!
Do you have the fight in you?
Before we proceed to read further on how to fight, shouldn’t we be clear whether we have the fight in us? Take this quiz now and find your fighter score. See how the score improves over months as you continue within network of men’s rights activists.
The way of the warrior
Warrior knows the enemy within and the enemy without. The enemy within can be fear, doubt, impatience etc.
Warrior doesn’t choose to fight unequal battles.
Warrior doesn’t fight at a time and place chosen by the opponent. He creates his own battles and his own circumstances.
Warrior doesn’t go to the battle unprepared.
Warrior doesn’t blame the circumstances, but instead uses whatever circumstances exist to his full advantage.
Many of the questions in fighter quiz will fall into one of above categories.
Why are you fighting, who are you fighting
I don’t want to fight, I just want peace.
I don’t want to fight, I just want divorce.
I am fighting my wife.
Read my maintenance book (DV and CrPC 125) if you want to save HARD EARNED money
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I am fighting injustice.
I am fighting against gender biased laws.
I am fighting for a better society.
I am fighting for a better next generation.
Fight the interim maintenance, forget all other cases including 498A
Golden rule: fight interim maintenance case whether under CrPC 125 or DV Act (or even HMA 24), as if your life depends on it.
All other cases can wait – that includes IPC 498A, 406, 323, 506, 34 and so on. And wait they will anyway in judiciary. That’s how game goes. The divorce industry works by delaying things, not speeding them up. More the delay, the more frustrated husbands become, because not only they have to run around courts, they have to keep paying interim maintenance too in the interim.
Which is why I suggest reducing interim maintenance to a minimum is the best strategy, on top of which everything else can be built up over time.
The dangers of high interim maintenance
- Wife continues to get interim maintenance every month, so she is least bothered about finishing up cases quickly whether she has filed or you have filed.
- Only in cases where wife has a boyfriend she may be in a hurry to get a divorce decree. But that is not true for every case.
Unscrupulous women’s main motivation is extraction and extortion of money. Many of them are not even bothered about getting a divorce, since probably a married status with maintenance works very well, especially for those with children. As long as they are able to extract a high maintenance every month, they can coolly wait for husband to lose patience and agree to a lumpsum settlement.
The advantage of low interim maintenance
- Wife gets Rs 2,500 or 3,500 per month, which is just enough to sustain her. Her hope of getting an instant lumpsum of 20 to 50 lakh or even more are dashed. That creates a psychological pressure and damage.
- Now even if cases get delayed as they will anyway, husband doesn’t have to worry about bleeding a lot of hard earned money every month to parasitic wife. Paying 2,500 per month is much better than paying 10-15,000 per month.
- Once interim maintenance is awarded, husband can focus efforts on other things like filing TEP, RTI, collecting more evidence and so on which will help to fight 498A/406 etc. But instead if he has to pay high interim maintenance, he will again go for appeal or revision thereby wasting more time there.
Most people do the opposite by spending too much time on 498A even after getting bail, by telling everyone about their innocence etc. Their thinking is that somewhere someone is sitting who is all eager to listen to their story that they didn’t take a penny of dowry and so on, but unfortunately for them they have very little understanding of the divorce industry, which is all tuned not to give a chance to husbands to get rid of any of criminal or even family court cases.
Most important, collect proofs of wife’s working, income, job profiles etc
Often repeated statement by husbands: My wife works but I don’t have proof.
Then make it top priority to get whatever proofs possible. Without that lawyer and judgments won’t help!
Ways to collect proof of wife’s working:
- Check her facebook profile for any pictures at workplace
- Check Linkedin profile and other job sites for wife’s profile
- Any business card in name of wife which shows her name, company designation?
- Income tax return (ITR), which is one of the best proofs of anyone’s income because usually real income is always higher never lower than what’s given in ITR
- Try to get details from EPF (employee provident fund) office.
- Network with other at local city’s weekly meetings. It’s by such relations that people are able to get details of wife’s job simply by finding someone else who works in same company or who knows someone who can get the proof. BUT don’t go there with this as the sole expectation.
Write the story, Collect the evidence
- Write complete details and steps which happened from time of engagement, wedding, honeymoon etc, after marriage, till wife left. If she left several times and came back, then write all those into a computer document or paper if you don’t use computer much.
- Why is this important? With passage of time, we forget many small things which may have lot of importance. Also, most advocates when approached by husbands, don’t advise them on most crucial things like evidence etc and so people think that merely by filing some objection or filing a divorce/RCR petition, they will be able to get divorce within 1 year or 6 months.
- Note down all important events like visits out of town, important phone calls etc
Evidence
- Collect all photographs of wedding, honeymoon etc, other photographs of ceremonies, visits to any places with wife. When wife says in her petition or affidavit: “I was not given food”, you can show those cheery pictures of your honeymoon to her during her cross-exam to ask why her cheeks were so rosy and plump if she was starving all the time!
- Also collect any videos.
- Get copies of all bank statements, credit card statements of your own. Get wife’s too if you can.
- Keep record of all SMS. Use a software to backup the SMS since old SMS may get deleted on some phones.
- Keep record of phone calls on the phone or itemized billing.
- Keep all receipts esp cash receipts since there won’t be any other record of cash purchases.
- Record phone conversations etc from now onwards at least.
There are many useful judgments on this site where maintenance to wife was denied. For the purpose of educating men (yes, it can seem like an education) on how to deny or reduce maintenance, I have recently published a book on the topic which is available as a eBook readable on all computers and mobile devices. I hope it will be of use to men who have to face maintenance and other cases.
How a 498A case proceeds
http://menrightsindia.net/2015/01/notes-and-questions-on-court-procedures.html
Questions about 498A, dowry allegations
Question: In FIR they mentioned expense of marriage Rs 10 lakh and dowry articles of Rs 20 lakh. Where as In DV they mentioned total expense of 20lakh . bills are attached of rs 4 lakhs and estimate slips of 5 lakh.
My view: There is a very potent weapon which may take 1.5-2 years to fructify, but if used it can bring the FIL (father in law) and wife’s party to their knees. This is called Tax Evasion Petition. If wife party has alleged gruesome amount of dowry or marriage expenses, which are far above their station in life and income sources, then a tax evasion petition is due on the earning member of their household which is mostly always FIL. Some FIL have been forced to pay lakhs of penalty to tax department after investigation in tax evasion petition.
Typical sequence of maintenance/DV cases
http://menrightsindia.net/2015/01/notes-and-questions-on-court-procedures.html
Questions about DV and maintenance cases
Note: these questions are real but the dates and other details are changed so the asker cannot be identified. There are 1 lakh 498A and apart from that maybe 50,000-80,000 DV, CrPC 125, divorce cases filed every year so it’s always possible some case may seem to have a similarity to yours.
Question: Hi, I have DV ,498 filed from her side and divorce filed from my side… 498 charge sheet came on MTH 2014..in DV she has been avoiding since last 1.X years… will all lame excuses… what should I do
My view: Do whatever you can, but don’t leave your work to fight out the DV/maintenance case. Because THEY WILL keep avoiding to appear for evidence, that’s what all these DV filers do! The best way is to fight the interim maintenance proceedings fully so as to pay low maintenance, and after that relax for anywhere from 1-3 years till the main petition in DV proceeds at a snail’s pace.
Question: If husband not working then his father laibale for responsibilities of girl
My view: Not yet at least. But with a proposed amendment to Hindu adoptions and maintenance act, even this may become a reality.
Question: I am slapped with 498a,406,34 IPC , DV and CRPC 125 . Got AB in criminal case. While in DV interim of X000/- per month is ordered. Her evidence completed in DV half cross is done half is pending will be on DDMMYYYY . in 125 judge asked her what u want she said divorce. Asked me I said I am ready to keep her. Judge said if she is unwilling u can’t force her so anyway u have to pay alimony as per law monthly so it is better u pay 1 time alimony and take MCD.
My view: The fundamental mistake being done here by husband is like this. Wife has filed criminal cases, and asking for divorce verbally during open court proceedings, but she didn’t file divorce petition actually. So in a way she filed criminal cases and DV to reach her actual target which is divorce and off course lumpsum settlement. Actually she has used the right weapons available in the Indian divorce industry and able to achieve the real target of divorce/money without even filing for divorce!
Now husband here says that he wants wife to come back. What does that tell any reasonable third person not associated with either party? That wife has filed all these cases, she wants divorce, but still husband wants to take her back; so the conclusion is that husband must have tortured her and wife’s criminal and DV allegations must have some truth!
No matter what any lawyer tells you, after wife files DV/498A and such allegations, one should never say during mediation or open court that one wants the wife to come back. Proceed with evidence, cross-exam, full trial and defeat wife’s cases. If you followed the advice given on this site, once you have a low interim maintenance award, wife can’t afford to wait for many years living off on a low amount every month, so she will be forced to decide to call the battle off and go for MCD.
Myths about DV and maintenance cases
Question: Does daughter-in-law have right to property of her father-in-law or mother-in-law?
Not really. She can claim it as residence ONLY IF she has stayed in that house for a sufficient period of time to justify it as a shared household as given in Batra vs Batra SC judgment which defines shared household.
But the way the usual public behaves when facing a complaint from daughter-in-law, it seems the conventional thinking is that somehow the daughter-in-law/bahu is eligible to half the property or one of the properties after 1 day of marriage!
Best piece of lawyer wisdom I have heard is from sister of a husband facing false cases: “Our lawyer says that even your property may be taken by your brother’s wife”
With lawyers like these, who needs _______________
Just in case if you have great urge to file divorce on wife
You can read another post of mine on why Indian men should be very careful before filing divorce. If that has not dissuaded you, maybe the best course of action would be to do some study of your own in understanding the process of divorce, key judgments, strength/weakness of your evidence/case etc. The only reason an Indian husband should file divorce is if he is convinced that handling multiple cases like his own filed divorce case, maintenance (HMA 24) filed by wife; and most likely other cases like DV Act, IPC 498a/406 filed by wife — will be much better than living in uncertainty and torture of wife.
To tackle such issues and reduce time and effort of MRAs getting diverted into these issues, I have written the book on topic of divorce for men. It contains more than 70 judgments on topics of divorce due to cruelty, desertion, adultery, false cases by wife, wife’s adultery, annulment etc. The best way to approach this book is as a self-study guide (so basically I can wash my hands off 
). Read the judgments (including my summary, and commentary), and make own conclusions about strength/weakness of your evidence, case (if already filed), and what to expect down the line. It is available as an online eBook below (Note: available in digital Kindle format only, not as printed book, not as a PDF file):
Book: Guide for Men on Divorce, Cruelty, Desertion, Annulment
To know how to purchase and read on Kindle, go to end of this post and read.
Hi Sir,
My wife was mentally harassing me and my family. One day she suddenly started screaming that am hitting her in our society and her parents and relatives used to threaten us all the time of filing a police complaint against me and my family. Due to which i have filed a police complaint against her and her parents.
Post that My wife has file a complaint with CAW cell against me and my parents for domestic violence and dowry and from last 4 months she is staying with her parents. Now after four months of counselling she is saying that she doesn’t want to live with my parents and want to live separate with me. Also i am paying her some amount on monthly basis after our marriage despite of the fact that she is also employed. She always harass me that i have not done anything for her. our 11 months old baby is also with her.
1. What legal remedy is available to me considering the given facts..??
2. I don’t want to get separated from my parents as i am a single child and they are also dependent on me.
3. Its clear she only wants money from me and wants to live separate so that she can live as she wants to, her mother has lots of interference in our relationship and it is also one of the main reason of failure of this relationship.
4. Most important can i get the custody of my 11 months old baby.
Request your guidance on same.
Thanks & Regards
Getting sole custody is very difficult unless she has abandoned the child. You can always try for shared custody though. Details in this book:
https://videv.gitbooks.io/child-custody-guardianship-and-visitation-for-fat/content/
Basically she’s trying to frustrate and harass you to the level that you file divorce, and then they hope to extract alimony (and maybe ask for a property too) in name of child. That’s the reason she’s saying you have not done anything for her. This is standard technique for earning women who put allegations on husband.
No one can force anyone to live with them. But she can always file maintenance cases on you which would have happened already but for the fact she’s earning so it’s delayed.
Dear Sir,
My wif has a DV case against me and due to her regular visiting the police with the kids on false pretexes.
I left my ho,e and settled with my mom on advice of the police as she will constantly keep doing the same.I have bought a shop and a flat .She runs a beauty parlour in the shop.
I was working in a private sector when this DV case was filed.She used to come to my office on many occassions and send messages to my bosses and calls and telling them i am a fraud and all bullshit .Hence due to this regular visits and pressure i left my job a year back and now not working.I have an interim order to pay 5000 each child ie., 10000 per month and that is bleeding me because i have no job.
How do i proceed ahead.Due to her harrasment at the jobs my mom supported me to start a placement agency as she has helped me with 50000 to start the office in her name as i am staying in her house.My wife has come to office and started banging the door and creating havoc.She also Bite me on my wrist so adly that the cops had asked to take a Tetanus injection during the complaint i had registerd.Will this doctor cerificate and Compliant and photos help me in the case to prove that i am getting harrased everytime i earn for myself?
I have a Flat and shop totally emi paid up by me but for Finance reasons if I die my wife was a co applicant in the aggreements.How do i go around it in the cross in 3 questions she had faltered and her lawyer after that has postponed for some reason o=r the other.
Please hel me out with a solution or right way to proceed.All my money is stuck in my properties which habve both names because finance company demands wife to be included even she has no papers of incom..My wife is running a parlour in my shop for
years and she has also put in WS that she runs a parlour with employees.
Please advise I have read your answers and appreciate your thoughts and agree with all the answers you have put down
>>My wife has come to office and started banging the door and creating havoc
For future, you can put CCTV camera outside office entrance.
>>Will this doctor certificate and Compliant and photos help me in the case to prove that i am getting harrased everytime i earn for myself?
Also you should get MLC (medico legal certificate) in such situation. More than this one can’t get better proofs!
>>shop totally emi paid up by me but for Finance reasons if I die my wife was a co applicant in
You can file suit for division of property and since you have paid everything the property title should be in your name. But it will take several years so money can’t become unstuck quickly.
>>parlour in my shop for years and she has also put in WS that she runs a parlour with employees
No order has been made for wife’s maintenance so it seems her income has already been taken into account.
hi sir i am muslim married last year in 3 months my wife got pregnant in her 3rd month of her pregnancy she left for parents house in end 5th month of her pregnancy she when i asked her to come she insisted to stay back but after little argument she returned. during her stay she kept insisting to go back to her house. and but denied as our gynecologist suggested not to travel but with in 25 day of her return she had quarreled with me during which in haste of moment i said u can go if u dont want to stay but i later i told her not to go but she call her parents and left my home saying that she is travelling by train and left home in ending 6th month of pregnancy during which i was at office but when i came to know that they were traveling by by bus i called my Father inlaw to come back as they didnt board bus yet for which they refused went to their home after which i didnt speak to her for brief time but eventually i started talking with her but every time we speak she raise some or other issue i end up quarrel so i stopped talking to her as the time passed she gave birth to a son on feb end .i went to hospital did my formalities during operation and left the same day telling her windup the things as soon as possible but she refused i told her to think up and returned now its almost 3.5 months after her delivery she is not coming back so i sent her a lawyer notice for RCR now its 25 day and they didnt respond
i am not talking to my inlaws as they used filthy language to abuse me and spreading bad about me with all relatives that i didnt treat her daughter well and we didnt give her proper food and abused her harassed her
1)now what are my legal options as i am muslim?
2) if she returns i want to make sure she stays away form her parents for 2 years minimum how i can do this ?
3)what are case i can file agnist my inlaws so that they the dont spread bad about me , nither beat me or harm me or my property in any way ??
plz help sir
1) you have already sent RCR(muslim equivalent?) so I guess that was your legal option.
2) No legal way to ensure this.
3) No legal way to ensure this. But if they do harm you or property, you can file police complaint.
I got married in 2003,my wife started life away from me and my family since 2005.Abd then she put 3 cases on me and my family members ,even on my father who is paralyzed…of Domestic Voilence and dowry ..And i am a poor man who earns a livelihood by driving approximately 10000..and i am unable to give her expenditure..Since 6 years i am away from my family ..and i dont even have a share in my fathers property..and now after 7 years she is demanding for whole expenditure of 7 years ..which is approximately 6 lacs
How can i get an huge amount..what should i do..
.please suggest me something..as soon as possible..
I think you have tried the “Devdas” approach, which actually doesn’t work out because if you don’t pay up maintenance, then it keeps accumulating over the years; and one day the decision has to be made whether to pay part/full amount, or risk possibility of going to jail, which happens rarely but is well within legal possibility.
Maintenance amount is mostly based on salary/income, so talking about “not having share in father’s property” etc not going to help in reducing it.
i was married on 12 dec 2015 and my wife left the house on 16 jan 2017 and i filed divorce and after thay she file 498a 307 3/4dv act on me and all my family members
now she file dv case included my father and my brother in law and my sister father in law who stay different house
please suggest that my brother in law and sister father in law name can be removed from dv case please suggest
Names of relatives who are not staying in same city or not involved at all, can be removed but you have to try for that in court.
Hello sir
My wife file 498a,406,323,dv sec12 18,19,20 and want 100000 intrm and 50000 monthly for her and my son. And i don’t have any property only my perants self aquired so she want mantinance to my father and mother now she send summom to me and my parents for dv…i am living with my parents do i need to left my parential home??? I am single son and my monthly income is 12000. But my wife said my income is 3lakh i dont even file itr becoz of low income…please help
DV can be filed on parents too, but for maintenance you will be liable. Why do you need to leave parents’ home? Just because of hearing tips from people?
Fight based on evidence and merits. Can’t say why wife’s expectations are so high if you earn 12K
Hello
im married since 2013. Was working out of city and stayed there for 1.5yrs and after that i resigned and joined business and started living with my parents. Never demanded any dowery or any stuff like that and watever in laws given were in wife’s account and was utilised by wife only. Problems were there when we were living seperately but i was managing. Main problem is that my wife dont want to do household clores which is the main problem as my mother is working and wife is housewife. We have maid for full work. My mother is partially handicapped but still doing more household chores than wife. We had detailed talk with wife regarding the problem but no progress. Slowly slowly she became ill mannered with my mother due to which mother left home and started living alone as there was tension between my parents also. I specifically told my wife that i cant leave my mother and she is the one due to which my mother left me and i will leave u if my mother didnt come back. Nw im in tension that wife or her parents will file dowry and domestic violence case against my family and due to which my mother will loose her job and pension benefits. Plz let me know how shud i handle the situation as i know that her parents knows every detail which is happening at my house and they r the reason behind the scenes but cant prove the same
>>case against my family and due to which my mother will loose her job and pension benefits
If it was so easy for govt servants to lose job and pension benefits upon filing complaint, then there will be very little corruption in India in govt! Mostly I have heard govt employees may sometimes get suspended pending enquiry (which is not same as dismissal), but even that is more about allegations of corruption in govt department rather than a case filed outside.
It’s better to collect evidence to whatever extent possible.
I’m going through false 498, DV and 125 from last 4 years, but my main question is after the result of 125 how the maintenance procedure is done? because if my wife gets maintainence she will never give me divorce.
Read articles on this site. If you don’t learn even within 4 years, then maintenance amount can be anything that judge thinks reasonable based on what your wife alleges.
Why is your divorce a social issue? Will you help anyone else facing false cases if you are able to get divorce? You can barely handle own cases as of now.
Hello Sir,
I was married in May 2014. After a week of our wedding, my wife had epilepsy sort of attack, i enquired the reasons thereof from my in-laws but they they showed their ignorance about previous medical history. Thereafter with time these epilepsy sort of attack became frequent and continued to happen twice a month till she stayed at my place. I got her medically treated from goverment and medical hospital but their seemed no control over them.
In october 2014 i went for international assignments and my wife stayed with my mother at my place.Since, these attacks were frequent in nature and i was not in India, after mutual understanding my wife went back to her parental home in Uttrakhand in May 2015.
I came back to India in Octoer 2015 and made efforts to bring her back but in vain. We are not living together since May 2015. I tried to indulge my family members, relatives and Women Police Station to help me bringing her back to home but she and her parents disagreed for the same.
Now in June 2017 they have filed a Section 124 case for monthly maintenance and Domestic Violence case in court for which i am asked to attend court first time on 26.09.17
I have call recording, whatsapp msgs justifying my efforts to bring her back and to end this relation on mutual agreement since we were not living together for that big period.
Plz suggest me :
1. Now even i dont want to live with her how can i get divorce from her.
2. I am govt servant and earning about 55,000/- per month. My loan liabilites per month are around 38000/- besides other homely and personal expenditure. We don’t have any childern. My wife is graduate and not working but her parents are earning about 1.5 lakhs per month. What would be expected monthly charges i would be supposed to give her. She lives in Uttrakhand.
3. We are sepearted from Last 2.5 years almost. Can she file DV case even now. We had lived peacefully the time we stayed together but in her family influence and to extract money from me, they have filed this case on me though i am very sure they don’t have any concrete proof of any physical or emotional abuse on her .
4. They have also made my mother a party on it, what should i do.
PLEASE SUGGEST…
Read up posts on this site for more details to your questions. The questions betray you are just searching for some simple formulas and painkillers. Sure they can’t prove DV but just sitting and hoping won’t be enough to avoid maintenance etc
Sir, I am job less, my wife filled false case on april 2014, Now in last hearing on maintenance case judge is telling for MCD or i have to pay rs 5000 per month from the date she filled case, which is coming arround d1,80,000 in next 06 months. Already paid lawyer a high amt. now not having to fight. She is showing my last job record which i resigned before she filled the case.
What should i do.
One thing everyone has learnt very well in last few years is to always use the word “false” in front of “case”. However, in courts one needs to do basic work and submit WS/evidences/arguments as per procedures, and at the right time; merely saying “false case” is not enough.
If you have already decided to ignore basics of how law and courts work, then giving any advice won’t help either. There are so many articles on this site how to fight maintenance cases properly, but people want to enjoy the feeling of not paying ordered maintenance amount, and then see what happens! High maintenance arrears get accumulated, and now no one (including own lawyer) will even listen until you clear some arrears first.
Is it job of judge to tell you whether to go for MCD or not? You can file complaint against judge for this, but I guess having maintenance arrears is not the best situation to be in while filing complaint on judge’s conduct.
If you have paid lawyer a high amount already, does that make the maintenance order invalid? Did anyone force you to hire an expensive lawyer even after you were jobless?
Is there any judgment which says that husband not having job will automatically allow judge to dismiss wife’s maintenance application?
Since the First week of marriage, my wife had server headaches but she and in-laws always lied about that. Headaches become frequent and severe, so I consulted with doctor for that. Initially she denied any previous health issue but later she told that headaches started very long time ago, much before marriage. After some time frequent unconsciousness and vomiting started, but in-laws denied any such previous conditions.
She started the threat of suicide and started to run from home while leaving with me, when I checked with Doctor, they suggested Psychiatric help for that. On that she refused to co-operate and visit them and started threatening to us.
On every month, she used to live approx 20 days to her home and only few days to ours. When asked to help on household work, she simply refused to do so by saying that I have never done that and I am not going to.
Later, her treatment started for infection, typhoid, Viral, Asthma, and even Psychiatric, but in-laws refused to have any of health condition before marriage and started blaming that since the time she started living with me, she had all the issue. She even falsely accused me that I was try to pension her many times. Her mother is the one who is guiding her on all this.
I was out of station for few months, in which she lived only few days in my home with my parents and spent most of her time at her home.
Since last 10 months, she did not returned to my home. I have asked her to come to home and stay with family but she did NOT returned and said that she want to live with me only and would not live with my parents and she will treat me like slave etc.
I don’t want to live with her and tried to collect the proofs as videos, call records, pics and initially filled Section 9, but after 3 months of waiting and because of her denial of return and absence in Court, I have filled Section 13 for divorce. Before filing the Divorce I have informed her father that I do not wish to live with her and would be best for everyone to have this discussion and file mutual case, but they did not relied anything positive on that.
After this in-laws started filling false cases with Women cell, district probation officer for domestic violence, Dowry etc. Police and various offices are calling and but NOT sending and notification and noting down incomplete statement with sign, even though my divorce case is also under consideratio .And she is saying that she want to live with me. Although she is not living with me now and I haven’t seen her since MORE that ONE year
I don’t feel safe with her as she is NOT mentally stable, don’t want to do any work at home even cooking or basic household works, always wanted to go to her home, very disrespectful to my parents and do not want to live withe them.In-laws are only looking for opportunity to frame me and my family by threatening for cases , suicide etc, so for the safety for me I have to file the Divorce case first.
My parents are currently looking case on my behalf as I am living in different city for job. Please suggest me what could be the best course of action for me here as I am ready for mutual resolution and genuine compensation, but they are NOT looking interested at present and only interested on filling false cases.
Can I also include these false cases in my case as mental torture? And Is there any law in which I can file cases against my wife and mother-in-law for mental valiance? Can I deny to present on these proceedings if NOT receiving formal notice before 7-10 days before?
Please help
Filing divorce is already action you have taken.
False cases (if proven false or closed by police or prima-facie false) can help add to cruelty events even after filing divorce. Suggest to read judgments in my book:
Guide for Men on Divorce, Cruelty, Desertion, Annulment(only in Kindle Edition)
No law for mental torture of husband by wife except divorce.
Notice by police has to have reasonable time.
(To Priyanka Das)
If your friend goes on yielding to each illegal demands of the wife, there is no cure for him. Changing religion will not help.The only only way is, he must apply his mind, collect evidences, know some basic things of law, develop self confidence and face the situation squarely.Let him not depend on lawyers too much. Let him play his own game with all preparations, courage and confidence and he will surely succeed. Mind you,there is no shortcut to success.
Hii Sir Videv,
My best friend is having a serious problem.
A common friend called him to meet,as he went to meet there were people already set by the girl who were waiting for their bait (my friend).
It was a place near a lake. The girl literally started screaming saying he wanted to molest her. The people who were paid by the girl came running,and literally forced my friend to get married to her. She said they were in a relationship.
The truth is they were just friends,not even besties. The financial condition of the girl is worse,and my friend is a government employee. She wanted a secure life, she thought after marriage every thing will work out. This sounds dramatic,but it’s the sad reality.
She wanted a court marriage, otherwise she literally made him scared to file a false case against him of molestation.
He wanted to save his job, so he agreed. But before that he literally disagreed at this point. He said, how can this be possible when I don’t even like you more than just a friend. He thought he will get justice if he tells the truth to police,but police did not believe him. Just after court marriage she filed 498a against him. He was taken under custody for nearly a month. No one believed him. She still scares him every now and then. She literally forces him for intimacy. They got married in 2013 from then he is fighting for divorce. The lawyers he met told him if she disagreed he won’t get divorce. After family counseling they started living seperate. She still pops into his house if she needs money or intimacy. The guy didn’t love her for a single day.
She is a psychopath according to many. She abuses him on bed. She did no job of a good Indian housewife. She provokes others to file cases against him. As if it will bring her happiness.
Now the guy wants to get revert (Islam) because he found peace. He is also thinking about others consequences.
My question is if he gets revert will 498a still make sense? He will be a Muslim then.
Will he get divorce from her?
Will his wife have full control over him after he changes his religion?
What if he wants to remarry? Can he?
Can she once again send him jail for false allegations (498a)
Will the previous case against him be valid if he submits his revert documents?
How can he get rid of such a psycho wife. Who loves bothering him.
She asked him 35 lacs unofficially and she told him,that she will leave him if paid the money.
Please advice. My friend is depressed. He is having mental issues now a days.
He repeatedly told her that he doesn’t love her. He asked her why did she do all these,she says it’s all false, humbug. She is a big liar.She is after his property and money. She just doesn’t want to give divorce. Please help.
Hi,
wife was working and all the proofs like, salary slips, ITR, business cards, linkdin profile is submitted in the court. Husband filed income affidavit. Now wife has to file the income affidavit on next date which she is avoiding from last two dates. But now wife left the job and mentioned in the court that she has been terminated because of mental, physical and financial torture? How to deny or reduce the maintenance.
Regards
>> she has been terminated because of mental, physical and financial torture?
Tell court who is torturing her through remote telepathy since she is not even living with ‘torturing’ husband anymore, and in fact she should be enjoying her freedom from ‘torturing home’ of husband. Logically how can an independently earning woman get financially tortured. Isn’t economic independence held to be liberating and emancipating for women oppressed by ‘patriarchy’. Even if we assume it so, can financial torture by husband result in termination by company!
And given she was working earlier and is able-bodied, let her get some anti-depressants and get on with working and earning. No slack is cut for husband who argues about being depressed, so same logic should apply on women because we all are equal isn’t it; just push your lawyer to argue same way in court. But these lawyers become so pussified after spending a few years in the System, they don’t even want to argue based on common sense on behalf of husbands. You have to give him/her some dose of MRI gyan.
hi,
We got married in December 2015. All was good. One night woke up in the middle of the night and checked her phone with messages from another person working in her company stating I love you. When confronted that night she said sorry that she got carried away. I told her its ok but to give me time to forget all this.Monday she went to office and came back and informed me that doesnt want this marriage. when asked y she informed that i have always been insecure and have changed a lot and doesnt have feelings for me anymore. I tried to save the marriage but when checked her office notebook it had a letter of which i have a photo and it stated that he loves the other person. she came and took all her belongings and said that needs 10-15 days to decide and would come with the parents to me. I called my parents too and there was nothing but she shouted at me and left.Now she has sent me a notice that she would file criminal cases against me if i dont give her 5 lacs. she has put alligations like physical, financial and mental harrassments. where in even during the fights i never have touched her. I am not sure if she would put 498 a against me or my family members.
>> I am not sure if she would put 498 a against me or my family members.
you can prepare to deal with problem because trying to predict and hope for easy escape is not right strategy.
Many a time these toxic women are deliberately leaving such chat/messages to be seen in the open, and making phone calls somewhat recklessly, because they WANT you to find out, so then their drama can be started where husband tries to save marriage etc, and wife starts her final plan to humiliate and exit from marriage with a ‘decent’ alimony.
Dear sir
meri shadi 0ct 8 me hui aur main ek muslim hun meri wife shadi ki pheli raat se muje satana shuru kiya aur main bangalore main rahetahun mera netive me shadi huva lekin meri bewi shadi ke pheli raat se muje bahuth shatana shuru ki mane us ku manage kiya aur 10 din baad bangalore leye aya tu wu haar din mujhe khene lagi ke mujhe usse shadi nahi karna chahe taha laken maine uss ku haar ruzz shajhaya ke wo ye sub chud du lakin wo har raat mujhe mentaly tochar dena shuru ki aur meri ghar uss buhut shitan nazar atien hain aur uss ku mere ghar me mare huwe murdun bad bu aatti hai main usse kaha main in chezun main vishwas nahi kar ta lakin uss nee pherr mere bhaiyon aur meri bhabbi ke uppar ilzam lagana shuru kiya aur baad main mujhe pata chaala ke o har raat 1 clock ko kese ku phone baat kar ti teh ye mujhe mere father ne bataya main uss pucha tu o boly tumare fathe muje par arup laga rahe han pher eek din mujse bahur ladayi karne lagi uss din maine usas ke bhaiyun ku phone kiya aur bataya ke unki bahan ne asa kiya tu wo lug subha subha mere ghar a gaye aur meri biwi lekar chale gaye aur meri saat sirf 31 days the meri bavi thi daad mein maine mere saley ku phone kiya 1 mahine ke baad ke meri biwi lake wappaas chud du lekin uss ne ulltha meri biwi uss hath raat 1 bhajhe phone kara ya aur muje bahuth anap shanap sunnaya aur ase kaar ke 2 mahine beet gaye baad main mujhe mohalle ke ek aadmi ne phone karke bollaya main aur mere father wahan par gaye tu ultha mujhe hi baadnam kar ke mujjhe kaha ke main uss ke gaun me ghar karke wahen rane ke liye kaha tu main ne unn see kaha main meri biwi ke sth 12 se 4 din rahatahun pher app ku agety bathunga tu unhune man liye main meri biwi ke sath 4 din raha meri biwi ne in 4 din mujhe pher bahuth sataya aur main dr ke paas uss ku kar gaya tu ussne dr ke samne shor macaya dr mujhe kaha tumari biwi shor macharahi hai main is chek nahi kar saktha aur mujhe dr ne kaha tum ek secyateesh ku is dekha u tu main jis aadmine mujhe meri biwi malyatha us ke paas wapas gaya aur bataya is ne mujhe is taha sataya hain tu aadmi ke biwi us aadmi ku khud bataya ke o ladki pagal hain uss ku ladke ke sath nahi rahna hain meri biwi ka bhai college lecturer hain uss ne mujhe phasa ke shadi kardi aUr mujhe baad main pata challa ke wo ladki ko qud dr ne shadi karne see mana kiya asee kar ke 1 sall 2 mahine hogey aur ladki ke bhaine mere upar section 498a case mahila samath main kiya aur mere gaun me meri izat badnam karna shuru kiya meri gaun ussne ek lettr beja ke meri bahan ladke sath zindagi karna chati hain leken ladka hum respose nahi kar tha tu mere gaun walo ne in bat theqe qath shuru ki tu un lugun ke samne aya ladki pagal hain ladka 10 12 barr ladki logoun paas gaya
mahir bani kaar ke app mujhe is kuch na kuch rasta bata de
Join the groups (see top right) and post in required format there
Hello, I went to abroad on project assignment (short term-1month), during my absence my wife has carried all my expensive items (honda city car, royal enfield bike, jewelries, home theatre, 3D TV, 3D player etc)also child to her parents house. All items are in my name and I have all supporting documents including bank statement.
Later they have given police complaint/FIR saying i have illicit relationship with a girl and I used to beat her and give her torture. Also she has included my parents name and my child hood friend (girl).
The complaint is completely false as I don’t have any such relationship with anyone.
Later I have given NC in near police station, but nothing worked out.
Now they are giving mental harassment saying they will not leave me etc.
Kindly advise me, how to come out of this issue as I am an innocent.
>>Now they are giving mental harassment saying they will not leave me etc.
Kindly advise me, how to come out of this issue as I am an innocent.
They want you to initiate something, like divorce, and then see husband getting destroyed running behind mediators, divorce lawyers, and courts. It’s standard technique of most toxic females.
Friend… once (legal) wife starts doing drama, and you have a child also, there is no easy ‘come out of this’. Law defines legal obligations on man towards wife and child(ren), and you can read other posts and comments by others too.
Though you may have ground to file divorce (false allegation of illicit affair), we don’t discuss divorce here since people expect to be baby-sit and expect that their getting divorce is somehow part of social work for others. You can read my divorce book. See divorce post for link.
My wife files 498/A on me and staying separately in the same city(as a paying guest). we have a son who is studying in UKG(6 years old), he was staying with us in the same city. Now she forcefully (without my permission-on my absence) demand TC fom th school where he was studying and taken him to her native place and made him stay with her parents(my in-laws) and without taking care of him , she returned to the city where we were staying and residing in PG. She filed maintenance case and she needs 50K from me and the house i have build(with loan). She mentioned that she is not working in the court appeal and she need maintenance but actually she is working here in an construction company and drawing the salary of 20K per month. unfortunately i dont have anything to proov that she is working as she is accepting salary in hand and she is smart enough to talk to her manager to erase her name from the company records. in this case wt should i do?
Ask court to get her employment record using CrPC 91
You can file child custody case also unless you believe son being raised by maternal grandparents is good for him.
Further guidance in groups only.
My wife left the house in starting of this year without any reason (although behind all differences her family members are the main reason, specially her mother who always interfere in our personal life, and information (left the son also) and her family didn’t talked to me and my family as well, even they didn’t informed us about when she reaches home, we got this information from police because when she left the home I launched the missing complaint and requested to police help me search my wife and same day her cousin brother came to the police station and launched the “Harassment Complaint” against me and my family and Police men asked me and my sister(married) to meet them in police choki and we update them the actual issue and they said they will do as per the law, & after a month, their relative approached us and she came back to our home and her mother started again the same course, and we got fight in between and last month my mother got some health issue, and I was in hospital with my mom to get her operate , and she left the home again without any reason and this time she left the house with our son, that last time she did the mistake (confirmed by her relative) because last time also concern was to get the our son only, and they afraid to fight the custody case because it may be time talking for them also to get custody of our son.
Now they have launched the case of 125 against me with all the false allegation, that we demand the dowry and they gave us, and last day when she left the house, I asked her to left the home, and the truth is I was even not in city where we live, I was 50 K.M far from our home that time she left the house with the help of her family.
Now questions are :
1. Is it compulsory to give maintenance even she is more qualified, from well to do family, and my income is not the same as she mentioned in section 125 case. If yes then how much and what are the ratio of this ? She filed a case in Haryana and I live in U.P.
2. Our son is about 4 year old, and what are the chances to get custody of my son, as she don’t love him as much as she show, and she took our son because she knows our son is the weakest point of me and my mother, because we have this family members only.
A. If I request to the court to give me visiting right then how much it can be? Can court order to my wife that our son can stay with us 1-2 times in a month during weekend? Or just I will get some visiting hours to see our son?
B. In First week of Oct my son will become 4 year old and I want to celebrate his birthday as we do always, but the problem is now my wife is not permitting to talk to my son, she is not picking my phone calls, no sms reply, and even any of her relative don’t want to talk to me, because they have some kind of strategy as they have some lawyers in her family and they may be instructing her for the same.
So can I file any appeal in Chandigarh high court and do some orders to my wife and her family so that my family can meet with him on his special day?
3. In section 125 they have marked all the false allegation so my point is court will ask her also to prove those points or only I have to defend myself, and she don’t need to do anything?
I have all strong points/proff that her all points are fake.
4. They have stated in 125 they have sped more then 40Lakh in wedding and even after they gave us almost 5 lakhs rupees in response of our demands, even the truth is we gave them 3 Lakhs Rupees when they need to clear some loans, even we never demand for the same.
In our wedding it was normal wedding and we didn’t demand anything and even I didn’t get anything from my inlaws, kind or cash.
Can I request to court that check the ITR’s of my Father in law and mother in law during the years to prove that they didn’t have such amount during the years?
5. I have filed a case under section 9 will it help in custody/125 cases, didn’t file the custody case but will file soon.
Please help me in these points and if any god lawyer from Jagadhari then please let me know I wana take some legal advise.
>>1. Is it compulsory to give maintenance even she is more qualified, from well to do family
People need to stop thinking of these issues as engineering/mathematical problems which have a neat formula like solution, but really as family/social/justice and probability like issues… it all depends on how husband puts his case forward. This whole site contains an approach on these.
For custody of son, you have to get visitation immediately for which filing GWC case is necessary… more the delay, more the chance of kid poisoned against father and then judges use that as excuse to deny even proper visitation leave alone custody. Read shared parenting judgments.
>>So can I file any appeal in Chandigarh high court and do some orders to my wife and
Usually people keep spending time in high courts with various stay and visitation orders which they can’t get enforced. Your wife can also do the same. In my opinion keeping things in family court is better as much as possible. In my opinion, having 2-3 times minimum contact with child per month better than celebrating one birthday or such event every 6 months. Dad becomes more like santa clause who brings gifts and disappears after that!
>>Please help me in these points and if any god lawyer from Jagadhari
There are so many basic questions… better suggest read my maintenance book, and join our groups (see top right green button). Lawyer is only as good (or god) as you make him work.
Sir,
My brother got married in mar.
His wife wanted to control every financial entity and want to get seperated from family..
She in 04 months hardly lived 60 days with my family.
She was supprted by her family.
She called her family and threatened my family of killing/kidnapping my parents and brother in jun and filling false cases.and took her with them.
I am living in kochi with family. I have been married for 08 years and have two sons. My wife was with my parents for 07 and half years as i am in army. And after brother marriage i took my family to my duty station. We have a very happy family before brother marriage.
She only required to do household work and cook for parents where my mother n father helped her in that..
Now they have filled a mental harrassment case.
My brother is working in shiping n left for his job.
They now have showed totally different evil face for no issue…
I am afraid they may not file other section of false cases just to harass my family.
Please help and guide
Detailed guidance is given in our groups, see top right green button.
For your own case, learn about DV Act, CrPC 125, and most important child custody. Though cases after longer marriages are rarer, they are very much possible, and sometimes wife waits for a right opportunity/excuse or children grown up a bit before unleashing her weapons. Your taking family to duty station could be probably an excuse.
In general, you need to collect evidence wherever possible, without that it’s a fight between allegations of both sides, and in that part, such women are much better than men.
Hi,
1) Love marriage Hindu M/ Muslim F living independent, males parent disown.
2) Lady with help frm her father left with kid & jewelry
3) 1st 498a got dismissed at default
4) concurrent CRIMA DV case on
5) Court filing have @Muslim name of Male, while he a practicing Hindu. Same with kid who is raised a Muslim by mom against father wish.
6) Judge denied father access to kid, total zero contact from day of leaving.
7) Rcr filed
8) Judge granted 2+1 k maintenance pm till DV result
9) Male paid no maintenance as judge denied kid access
10) Case now at purpose ‘steps’, after ‘BW issue’
How will the case pan out now, what may happen now.
I can’t say about law issues in inter-religious marriage, but filing RCR (I am assuming to reunite, not to get AB etc bullshit) and then not paying maintenance (logic being no kid access) is a very unwise strategy. It will actually reduce chances of future modification of child custody/visitation orders. 2+1K is not very high maintenance anyway, so it will be easy to label such husband as uncaring to wife, and cruel to own child.
Sir, after reading all above cases I felt that I am very much like poor husband who. Don’t want to leave her wife though she filled a fake case of dv. 498a, with many more sections. She is doing everything willingly wid the concent of her parents. They filled a case we appeared in front of sp n presented our case. In their report police said that no allegations could b proved. I asked my wife I am ready to forget everything if she is willing to improve. Coz sir I dnt want get divorced due to social image and I am in government job so it may affect my job as well. She stayed here for two weeks but again she has strted behaving like earlier.
Pl tell what if I go for divorce
Guideline 1: Whether you are in govt job, MNC job, or autorickshaw driver; bringing back DV/498A wife always fails…
Guideline 2: She won’t go against her parents, no matter what is the history of relationship.
Guideline 3: check if feminist mother/family environment. Read advice to men post.
>> I asked my wife I am ready to forget everything if she is willing to improve.
>>Pl tell what if I go for divorce
Once you forgive/forget, it becomes difficult to invoke that as mental cruelty.
Entirely your decision, we are not divorce counsellors: read this first:
http://menrightsindia.net/2015/01/why-indian-men-should-be-very-careful-in-filing-divorce.html
false domastic case main compainsation mil sakata hai kya? domastic violance case husbond jit gaya hai.
mushkil hai… kyonki jab tak order mein ye nahin likha ki case jhoota daala gaya tha, uske basis par compensation (ya defamation vagereh) ka case karna mushkil hai… Aur lawyer log is maamle me kuch madad karne ko tayyar nahin hote, unhen kuch pata bhi nahin hota ki jhoote case mein kya kar sakte hain
Hi Videv brother,
Your literature with your way of depicting in here is just par excellence, May GOD bless you bro. If could just you advice me too pls.
MY FAMILY BACKGROUND- FATHER- a middle class businessman, aged 73, having advanced(4th stage) prostate cancer with extensive skeletal metastasis, and chronic diabetes. Physically not much active
MOTHER-aged 67, having chronic kidney disease stage3, physically inactive, chronic diabetes, left leg amputated below knee due to gangrene, on the day, when i was getting married on 14th april 2014.
My elder sister with her two sweet and caring daughters also live with my parents since their childhood because my brother in law was not a wise man,he was indulged in illegitimate activities.
My family values- Always simple and sober, no expectations from daughter in law in terms of living together( neither she lived till date), no wishes that she should be concerned about their health, or even just paying a visit once in a blue moon to their house.strictly, never desired for any money, or dowry from her parents in any mean. Never, showed any sign of dissapointment from my wife’s parent that they should come at our home for a feast or they should invite them for the samen, or be in talking terms right from the begining of this selfish relation. Though, i know this is not the truth, just like every decent, and normal individual, they had also wished for a harmonious relation from my wife’s side, but this could not be made possible. My parents just not to see me sad because what they realize about this relation and treatment from my wife’s parents. My parents have always pretended they are ok with it, and always preach me that you dont spoil your relation with her just because of us, we are today would not be tomorrow. Keep your relation with her and her parents, so that you would be treated wisely.
WIFE’S FAMILY BACKGROUND- FATHER, aged 54, not having any physical or health issues, phisically active, not financially sound much, to be more precised, not similar to us financially, a service class person, MOTHER- 50,BP problem, physically active. A 2years elder brother to wife, works in corporate in delhi. Wife’s mother is extremely dominant in her family, her father listens what she wants to be happened, or to be done. These people are a way manipulative, selfish, greedy, low mentality, issue maker even if there is no any issue, always misrepresent things, our words, and statements in a wrong array, and that becomes a matter of arguements, whatever arguements, whatever fights, howsoever disputes among me and wife have taken place, leave the matter of her parents alone, my parents say, we dont see any flaws in her, she is a good girl, dont spoil your marriage, let them do whatever they want, whatever they wish. It is happening right from the begining. Having seen all these reactions of my parents, she, and her parents understood that they do not answer back, so lets keep on rocking like this. When i am not at home and go for job onboard the ship, she stays with her parents, she doesnt call my parents, or visit them even once. Her parents take her everywhere with her, without even informing my parents, its like my parents are no more in the picture. And whenever she would have visited my parents home only along with me, after coming from there she always misinterpreted, and misrepresented the words of my parents, either kids or young.
She never would have made even tea for my parents, or even a single meal till date. Whenever, she came with me to my parents home, she been treated like a guest of honour. Every jwellery article is kept under her father’s custody in the bank since marriage. They are as manipulative, and as cheap mentality people as i really think very few would be on earth. She always threaten me for calling her parents, my parents, relatives, and society during our arguements/fights at our flat.her parents never asked her, or made her understood their daughter that she should atleast call my parents to know their well being atleast even for the sake of formality.
Now for 3.5 months there is a total communication gap in either parties. When they saw there is no initiation by our side this time, in order to have us retaliated they have started whisper campaign. That with all jewellery and clothes having grabbed of our daughter , her husband has thrown her outta home. Thats why she is living with us. I hvent seen my daughter for 3.5 months despite of a distance of her home from mine is 500mtrs.
Mother of wife being feminist/dominant matriarch is a very common trait in such families… Their behaviour etc is also within the pattern, and more on the reckless/shameless side, and it’s already explained on this site in detail.
It seems a pre-planned thing from their side. Your merchant navy (I guess) job, your parents old and bed-ridden; decent minded people, so they though you can be crushed /manipulated in no time. And your parents have played along too, but that’s very common; most guys’ parents think let’s give the couple more time/freedom, and things will get better. And that’s exactly how the women become more and more dominant/aggressive and there will never be an end to it.
Difference in financial status has also backfired, since sometimes guys’ side thinks let’s get a simple girl, and after marriage they see before their eyes the simple girl transform into something else – it’s hell to pay and more.
The main problem I see is you have a kid, so now you have been properly trapped, and all the elders’/society’s advice to have children to better relationship falls flat on it’s face! It’s the worst thing one can do to the children, who may end up growing with a ‘single’ mother eventually.
They are moving to end stage (according to them) to frustrate you into filing divorce etc, or negotiate a MCD. There is no legal solution for men, you just have to deal with it now. For seeing child, you can file GWC case to get visitation rights at least.
Videv brother,
Many thanks for your prompt advice. May you please guide me as to how can i defeat them? I do not want to be henpecked by them anymore now. I know what they want or expecting onwards. Here i am with a feel of fight indifatigably. I do not want to accept their greedy grounds. I just have truth and their wrong doings with me so far. And about fear, it has reached off beyond black hole. I am bloodedly prepared to be in the bars, tortured by police anyhow. But , I do not want to see the ball in their court, and for it whatever it takes, I am willing to withstand. How to bolt their butts? Even if it costs my sanity, respect i am done to drive away.
You indeed are an oracle of such subject, i been reading consistently.
Please kindly advice on brother, i shall be so thankful to you.
Further discussion done in groups only, see top right green button for whatsapp/facebook groups.
Hello Vivek Brother
I’m called imran, I have recently followed you @ quora as well and have bought HOW TO REDUCE MAINTENANCE under DVA & CRPC 125 through kindle amazon. The dynamics of your ripen experience and mechanisms of your legal advices given in are just of an immense help in distress, my fears are gone, many thanks bro.
May you please advice me on following.
1- Its been now 16 months, things and conditions are as similar as i had left and joined sea service for 6 months, came back in jan this year, the only change is my daughter turned 1 year old, they celebrated her birthday without inviting my parents. In my absence also they kept on GAGA about fake and cheap lies for dehumanizing me. Now somewhat they have kept silent having seen no response from our side so far, neither society is asking us due to the loyal status of my father in locality. One mediator without our knowledge visited their home for patch up, They refused for any mediation within family members.
1- My beloved is saying to the people, she does not wanna continue with me anymore, nor she ever will agree for divorce. Saying she just needs money for herself and for my daughter, which is inevitable by law also, we know that.
2- Her father will be retired in 2019, will settle in meerut then. He threatened that, once he settles in meerut, he will make our lives miserable, including my brother who is settled in gurgaon. I’m sure he will file cases there having his relatives around with full back up. How will i be able to safeguard myself, if any of my visit there will end me up physically tortured by them, as practically i am not sultan or sunny deol, any advice bro?
3- Once litigation starts, will i be able to fight it out and pursue my sea service for 4 to 6 months at sea simultaneously? Would i be able to manage my absence of such slot during litigation? cant settle ashore cos my credentials are valuable for sea service only.
4- My parents health is getting worse due to already coping up with terminal illnesses. I’m sure opposite party is waiting for my parents end to come out with more naked moves.
5- My mother cries and sighs, she says get us along with you to magistrate or police station, will narrate our ordeal to them, they shall understand it. But,mom does not know what if it will backfire by them having us booked on full package as you educate about.
Brother, Please feel free to advice in your spare time with your valuable unputs.
Many thanks
Imran
>>Saying she just needs money for herself and for my daughter, which is inevitable by law also, we know that.
Not applicable if mother is not taking care of child or child welfare is compromised. Read: gitbook.com/book/videv/child-custody-guardianship-and-visitation-for-fat/details
>>I’m sure he will file cases there having his relatives around with full back up. How will i be able to safeguard myself, if any of my visit there will end me up physically tortured by them, as practically i am not sultan or sunny deol, any advice bro?
Don’t know how much you have read on this site or the book, cases are filed in police and trial conducted in courts. They are not a multi-people dangal that the side with more number of hefty relatives will win! Also, nor is your FIL any muhammad ali or mike tyson. Can’t give any advice on filmy emotions and speculative fears.
>>3- Once litigation starts, will i be able to fight it out and pursue my sea service for 4 to 6 months at sea simultaneously?
You have to manage through lawyer and else ask court to give dates which don’t conflict with service. One can’t be forced to quit job to participate in a trial. That will be violation of constitution under life and liberty. The courts can finish trial on a day to day hearing basis also, in fact that is how it is supposed to work as per civil and criminal procedural laws, but all that has been forgotten by public as well as lawyers and judiciary.
Vivek brother,
Many thanks for your prompt and brief advice, its such a positive enlightenment.
Please do not be offended, just one more suggestion if could you spare me with.
We are upbrought in a culture where unconditional love and emotions are always been found in the eyes of parents atleast.
My parents have percieved that mind games and path of patience is getting our ways on, they know they are frail and soon going to be done(they think) with lives having suffered from terminal illnesses, i mentioned in my previous posts. This thought is also there in the minds of opposite party.
Pertaining to this concern of them, my mom is urging me to have me get married with a girl of her choice. She is saying, i wish to die seeing you are settled.
I’ve told her its not easy anyways, and going to put me in another deep shit rather than what i already am in.
She is looking for just happiness of mine, and saying we want you to be happy before we die.
What would you kindly wish to advice over this concern, if i initiate my mom’s decision?
Opposite party knows about my parents health and condition, they are thus delaying things without any shame or guilt.
Is it possible if i get married with this girl of my moms choice, and then opposite party shall be having their a**es on fire and will book me under fake cases, can i fight simultaneously proving her cruelty over desertion and alienation?
Your advice solely will be treated with self responsibility.
>>can i fight simultaneously proving her cruelty over desertion and alienation?
You can fight simultaneously first wife while hopefully being happy in 2nd marriage, and in fact there is no choice except to fight it out if criminal or DV cases get filed on you. Of course they will try to use fact of 2nd marriage as ammunition that your real intentions were to abandon wife and girl child… Most likely you will not file child custody or even ask for visitation since child is too small, they don’t allow to meet child, and similar reasons. And from there mostly it will be going the settlement route, except the 2nd wife may not like if the settlement is too huge. So if you want to take the onerous responsibility of making two wives happy, the decision and risk has to be entirely yours. Because rewards are too.
mera sadi may 2013 me hua tha lakin ladki rahti nahi hai mane sec-9 ka case kiya lakin ladki 498a aur crpc 125 kar diya sir me 2013 se bimar hu sir sarirk aur mansik rup se kese de paunga maintaince sir upay batai sir kya karna hoga
>>sir upay batai sir kya karna hog
Upay sirf jyotishi logon se poochna chahiye. real life mein upay se nahin, purusharth se hi kaam banta hai.
aapka shaaririk rog hai to shayad maintenance kam ho sakta hai, par mansik rog (biwi ki vajah se) koi sunane ko tayyar nahin hoga, kyonki ye logon ki mardangi ki paribhasha se bahar hai ki ek mard apni biwi ki vajah se mansik rogon se grast ho gaya hai.
sec 9 daalne ka laabh sabse zyada biwi ko, aur uske baad aapke vakil ko milta hai. Kyonki jo biwi se itna pyaar karta hai ki usko vaapas bulane ke liye tayyar hai (498A ke bawjood), vo maintenance dene se kaise inkaar kar sakta hai?
I am doing business and my income is Rs 36,000 per month. I am ready to submit my IT Return in court. I had married in 2011 and have two daughters. Wife is not earning anything, but has smartly kept both the daughters with her. She has filed 498/406/34.
What is the maximum interim and final maintanence that i will have to pay in follg conditions:-
1) If she choose to ask for her maintanence plus two childrens maintanence
or
2) if she asks only for two childrens maintanence as she may want to re-marry within 2 to 3 years from now?
or
3) If i get custody of one child and she asks maintanence only for one daughter
I want to know the maximum amount in all the above three cases,
so i can prepare myself.
It will also help me to come out of current depression as i love my both the daughters so much and cannot afford to loose their custody at any cost!.
Also give me ideas to lower the same amount. Please reply!
I don’t see which maintenance case has been filed by her… so probably you are planning to file divorce, and that’s where our advice ends, because once you file divorce, be prepared to fight on your own. We are not here to advice how to get a cheap divorce for men.
How much maintenance for this/that situation: such questions can be answered only by the judge in your case (and he/she won’t tell you beforehand), or by a ‘good’ astrologer.
>>Also give me ideas to lower the same amount. Please reply!
Apply custody of both daughters by filing GWC case … this is not exactly an ‘idea’ though, you should be prepared to raise daughters without wife
hello sir,
mera naam reena sharma hain
mere bhai , maa, papa or mujhpe meri bhabhi ne case file kiya hain domestic voilance section 12,18(e) 19,20,22 and 23 D.V act.
SIR YE ACT KYA HAIN OR HUM IS SE KAISE NIKALE KRAPYA AAP MUJHE ADVICE DE.
DHANYAWAD
Advice to bahut hai website par, usko padhiye aur istemaal karen.
Wife has filed complaint citing cruelty by me, my brother, his wife, my mother and my father, unnatural sex by me (IPC 377) and outraging her modesty by my brother. She has filed complaint in Haryana through her uncle. I or any of my family members have never visited the place. We also do not have a copy of complaint yet and asked for it through RTI, but chances of getting it are bleak as my wife and her uncle has a lot of political clout in the area and police station.
Require urgent advice on following –
What should be my course of action –
1. Option 1 – File for Anticipatory bail in sessions court – My lawyer has said anticipatory bail will most likely get rejected due to lack of complaint or FIR and even interim bail can be rejected due to seriousness of the crimes. Also he doesn’t want to take this chance as Haryana and Chandigarh High court will be going for summer vacations from 3rd June and once AB is rejected, arrest is almost imminent
2. Option 2 – File for quashing of complaint basis jurisdiction. I have been living with my wife in Mumbai since marriage and have never gone to Haryana. My parents and brother live in Delhi and they have also never been to Haryana – Again, this has to be done either in Mumbai high Court or Delhi High court. Chances as per lawyer are slim given seriousness of the sections and lack of complaint copy
3. Option 3 – File for AB/Quashing in sequential order – Start with parents first.
4. Option 4 – Just sit tight and wait for next trigger and in case of arrest, file for normal bail
5. Option 5 – Go for settlement
Kindly guide, what should i do and how summer vacations of court is going to affect appeals etc
First of all, if you have multiple points and options then better to join groups and ask there, since these comments are not meant to start a thread of question replies.
Option 2 is the only logical one. Lawyer is giving you ‘practical'(practical more for lawyer maybe) advice, but not lawful one, since copy of complaint is right of accused, but maybe that doesn’t create proper future revenue line for lawyer.
People fear arrest, so applying for bail seems risk reduction, but the problem is by doing that you are kind of admitting that complaint in haryana is justifiable whereas it’s fit for quash.
Settlement option is not discussed at MRI… so don’t come to us for that.
Dear Sir, I have filed for divorce last year and its been 10 months already. I have filed divorce since marriage has not been consummated since 4years and also due to cruelty. She does not want to give divorce due to some reasons and playing all kinds of games. Now she has occupied my fathers house and I am staying separate. She is trying to put false allegations against my family and also put sec 498a against me. Kindly advice how I can go about this.
Read this website, and prepare for the long haul… your divorce not moving for 10 months or even say 3 years would be least concern to anyone in family courts etc.
Hello Rsptd Sir,
Main Amit sharma(U.P). Meri merriage may 2007 me hui thi.
Phir haal aj ke waqt me usne Nov 2012 ko 125crpc ka case uttrakhand ke family court me suit kiya tha. Aur jisme 3000/Rs permonth maintainance final hua Nov2013 me.
Aur Abhi jab 125crpc ka case pending tha usi time me October 2013 me usne 498a per FIR near kotwali(uttrakhand) me suit kr diya.
Ab kuc din pahle maine jab 498a ke case me case diary ko acche se padha to 125crpc & 498a ke case ka pura ka pura statement hee alag alag hai mtlb unclear statement hai.
Ab jab mujhe case me in baato ko dekh padh liya hu to uttrakhand ke advocate ko yah baate batai to wah meri baat ko ignore karne lage hai. Aur kah rahe h ki maintaince to uska haq h. Wah to legi hee. Chahe jis trh se.
Jabki ab uske haqiqat samne hote hue b wah highcourt me meri rit/yachika ko nahi suit kar rahe hai & mujhe meri baato ko ignore kr rahe hai.
Aur wah aksar mujhe paresan kr rahi h. N saath rahna h & n chhod hee rahi hai.
Sirf paresan kr rahi h.
Aur main kuc b n kr paa raha hu.
Mujhe sahi guideline dijiye.
Aur iske khilaaf sunwai ho sake…….plsssssssss urgent
you are blaming lawyers like many others, because you don’t know much about law. pahle 10-20 judgment padhiye, nahin to lawyer ke peeche ghoomte rahoge. achchca hua tumhari writ file nahin ki vakil nein, nahin to vahan par paise phookenen ke alava kuch na milta
It’s not a crime that wife files different allegations/incidents in 498A and CrPC 125. Fight each case independently on it’s merits. 3K is not that high maintenance anyway. Agar kanoon galat hain to sadak par aaiye aur uske khilaf aavaz uthaiye.
HI Sir,
My email id: 498a34adp (at) gmail (dot) com.
We got 100% arrange marriage on 26th september 2016. She and her family and relatives starting troubling us from day one as I apposed the regular visits of her cousin in afternoon time and father visits in evening time.
She has filed 498a34adp case on me and my family members. We lived together in my home only for 4 months that too with lot of issues from her family members as they were visiting regularly to my home.
She was pregnant of 3 months when i dropped her parents home for staying 4 days happily as pregnancy confirmed. she did not responded me when i went to take her back after 6 days, meanwhile we were doing chit chat and talk on phones regularly and she was ready to come with me. But I dont knowm, what was wrong and she told that, she will come with her father as her was not available as of now in this city. So, I returned by listening her words.
later, they invited my to rowdy-sheeters and finally they complaint on us in Police station.
…deleted
Please let me know as soon as possible. Or Please help me to meet you personally for further steps before its too late.
Deleted long email … Anyway, we are not here to advice on divorce… If you have good evidence, then use it when the time comes.
>>Please help me to meet you personally for further steps before its too late.
You can join the groups
Hello Sir,
I need a valuable guidance. My younger brother got married 4 year back and they have one kid as well. Two years back my younger brother has run away with another girl because his relations with his wife were not good.
Now she has filed the case against me my wife and father under section 498a, 125,sec 12 of domestic voilance and molestation allegations on me where as she is living with her parents for last two year.
Also, my father has disspart “bedhakal” because my brother and his younger wife were demanding to transfer the whole property on their name and thretning to the parents.
Please advise me what should i do. Can i change him “manhani” as she has put the alligation of Molestation on me which i had never done.
You can do manhani if you can convince your lawyer about it… results are no guarantee however. Everyone talks defamation, no one files it though.
All other cases, you have to fight by doing proper cross-exam when the time comes, and giving evidence in your favour.
Sir
My wife filed a case against me under section 18, 20, 21 22 & 23 with all false allegations and accessed my aged mother where as she never lived together for six months in my entire 15 yrs married life. She just filed the case when I m going to retire from service and going to get lum sum money. She take her stridhan as she never handed over any one. All other items that I hv proof as eye witness. In the mean time court gave interim oder to pay 18000 per month till retirement and after retirement 10000 where as my pension is 17000 only.
My quiry is how to get rid of the false allegations and how can I lower the maintenance amount
>>how to get rid of the false allegations
You have to deny false allegations, and give proofs which can destroy wife’s story wherever you have such proofs. Unfortunately, many lawyers advice men only to defend and deny… the problem with that is that wife will put 10 allegations most of them lies, husband will simply deny without putting any allegations of wife’s wrong-doings. That doesn’t create a ‘balanced’ picture of the whole situation in mind of judge because he doesn’t hear anything from husband where wife has done wrong. Many men think that wife may come back… if she wanted to come back, why did she tell lies in first place? Part of this is also about male vanity and protector (of woman) gene…
>>how can I lower the maintenance amount
You have to do a thorough work for this, there is no single technique or legal trick what most husbands are trying to find… read the maintenance book:
http://www.amazon.in/dp/B00VCA7YDS/ref=nosim?tag=menrigind-cm_mnt-21
Sir i was married in november 2013 and we lived hardly 6 months together.after that on dev 2014 she went to her house and denied to come back and on may 2015 she filed FALSE cases like 498A and 406 against me and my family at lower court.i went to high court fot quashing FIR but highcourt denied for quashing and ordered for Bail with in 30 days and I got bail on last of November 2015.No body opposed for my bail and after that they are not coming to court and my time is wasting I need divorce.ehat i must do?
>> they are not coming to court and my time is wasting I need divorce
Only paid guidance at site below for those eager for divorce… they are adding to other men’s troubles by giving lumpsum settlements and setting bad examples
http://mantomansolutions.com
Kya domestic jitne pr family member ka naam aya hota hai to kya wo manhani ka case kr sakte hai?
manhani hui aur proof hai to case kar sakte hain
Hello Sir,
I need your guidance and help.
we got married in 2012 and we also have girl child of 2.5 yr. Everything was running fine till 3.5 yr after marriage. But after that her parent kept pressurizing her to leave in separate house from my parent. I opposed this and continued living along with my parent.
she started fighting me and my parent without any genuine reasons. one day she left my house, leaving our child with me and started living with her parent. Then she filed a case under “section 97 of criminal procedure code” in court. This we fought and court dismissed this case and gave order in my favor.
Now she filed a false case of DV case under section 12,18,19,20 & 22(may be intentionally excluding section 21) though we never did any domestic violence against her. what are proofs she will be needing to prove domestic violence?
How we should we further about it?
should we file RCR? will it help us to prove that she is only not interested in continuing marital relation? which will eventually help in DV case or to deny interim maintenance or maintenance?
looking forward for your great help sir..
Thanks a lot in advance
>>should we file RCR?
No. That’s the ‘strategy’ of morons, and lawyers who are following 20 year old judgments which maybe only their seniors had read. File RCR only if you really want to live with wife, not for any legal advantage. It can actually increase your maintenance because judge will think he loves wife so much so let him pay more while case pending 🙂
Best is to read my maintenance book: http://www.amazon.in/dp/B00VCA7YDS/ref=nosim?tag=menrigind-cm_mnt-21
Can I get an answer about that my wife has tried to kill my family because I am not getting a separate house to live and I am not leaving my parents alone as I am only son of them .she is continuously threatening me to send me and my family behind bars in false 498
If wife tried to kill your family, then file attempt to murder case against wife; if not then your story has just ‘story value’.
hi.. thanks for supporting..
wife filled case crpc125 for maintenance and court pass the order of 30000 per month while my income is only 20000.. my advocate told me its on basis of property but its on my parents name not mine. now we want to challenge it on upper court.. we submit the documents like she takes all gold which is in bank locker and other imp.. but court ignore this and gave one sided judgment that what i fill.. now i need some guidnce.. how should i prepare before going to the upper court. and i am enable to order or find the ebook how to fight 125..
plz reply and thnks again
Most important is wife’s income.
After that your income. Your (or parents’ property especially) shouldn’t have any role to play in maintenance amount, since that is paid not by selling property.
Many others have found and purchased the book, so if you can’t even find it it’s indulging in your own self-pity & victimhood mode which never works
Hello,
I need a genuine advice in my case.
I am married in 2009 & it’s a arrange marriage. In the beginning of first 2 months everything is ok. But after 2 months I got abroad job so I left country & due to VISA financial difficulty I request to wife to stay home. And I went to abroad. Within a week my wife asked me to & stay with her parents for a week & I said yes but then she did not return. When I am in good financial situation I called her to stay with me. They after 2 months she pregnant so on her own request I drop het to her parents’ home. So not more than 8 months we stay together. They she delivered a baby girl. We were happy. Again I got the good opportunity so I changed the country. Meanwhile I bought a house in India which is on my name & my mother’s name. After change the country I went to USA where after joining the job I faced a major accident & due to that I almost became a handicap & her family is aware of that. While my major surgeries she gave her consent also. Still after 3 years of accident I am under medical treatment & government pay my monthly expenses to me as I am not fit for work & due to my medical treatment. Meanwhile my selfish wife files a case against me for physical bad treatment. In reality she & me almost 3 years away due to my treatment & she refuses to come abroad for my help. In fact all these are false statements she made & asking me huge amount. Still I am under medical treatment & jobless from last 3 years. Where she is a Doctor & running her own clinic & making a good money. Also their family is not allowing me to talk with my daughter if I called her. She had a family member who is a lawyer & helping her in this. Now marriage is happened in 2009 & she files the case in 2015 & claiming that I had given her bad treatment in 2010. And asking me huge money.
Please advise me. This is my genuine case.
All our comments are given by genuine people, and our advice is also genuine.
Actually it’s you who should be asking her for financial support if she is earning lot more than you, and you are bedridden etc, or unable to work full time. But that’s only under Section 24 of HMA which doesn’t come into effect until one of parties files divorce or RCR. So just give proof of her income to avoid maintenance.
People can join groups for more detailed discussion, no more replies to email comments will be given.
Hi Team,
I have a DV filed against me by my wife, where she has asked for 5 lac Rupees plus a maintenance charges of Rupees 20000 Per month. She has also falsely accused my parents and my younger brother and younger sister. I also met with an accident due to stress and was admitted to ICU for 1 day. My parents came to me and started staying with me to help me for my quick recovery, which my wife didnt liked. She left my home in Sept at one fine morning without informing me to her parents place and never returned. I had to leave my job as i am in state of stress and perplexed.
Now in Oct 2015, she has filed a DV against me and my family members. My queries are as follows.
1. What should be the next course of action ?
2. Is this the initial step to move towards 498a from her side ?
3. Should i file for RCR as she has left me without any cause and by her own will.
4. Do I have to pay monthly maintenance, inspite she was working and earning.
5. At present, I am jobless and dont have any source of income. do i need to declare this in court or produce any affidavit for this ? Please advice.
5. Since she is post graduate(MCA) and can early well for herself, can she ask for maintenance ?
6. No divorce application has been filed from her side so far. Please suggest if she files for Divorce at later stage.?
Regards
N K Sharma
With so many questions, suggest to read the maintenance book… filing RCR never gave any benefit to husbands, so all benefits if any go to lawyers and opposite party.
Not having a job is not a great strategy to avoid maintenance, and it can destroy career for sure if followed for a long time.
I got married to a gal in 2006 and after she hardly use to stay with me every 15 days she use to her moms place and stay their for months. in pregnancy she went for delivery in 5the month and she never came back and I tried to convene her to come back but she never use to took so much of money to help her parents in.
my son dose not even recognize me.I filled resident of conjugal rights but no use she never came back and in 2011 she filed a divorce case stating that she need one time maintenance of 20lac and the reason for divorce that she is giving is she want to take care of her parents as no one is their with them now.
After waiting for so long I found a gal who is very supportive stood up with me in all the problems after a huge lose in the business my wife left me but the this gal supported me.
I got married to her in 2012 aug and blessed with a male child and happy with her now all of sudden after 5 yer she is reopen the case and started me the summons pleas suggest.
You have missed crucial details. Let me take a guess: If you marry while not divorced, it’s a crime as per IPC so you received the summons for some case which you haven’t bothered to mention! After hiding information people ask “pls suggest”. My suggestion: grow a backbone and face the cases this time at least.
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sir i am doing plumber job and my salary 5000 pm so my wifr file against me on maintense case so save my life please
wife asked maintenance, and that becomes a life threatening condition that it requires saving your life now?
any job is a job, so better try to get your wife to work if you want to reduce/deny maintenance.
My wife has failed 498a this month plse tell me how to fight it my marriage be on 1/12/2014 and after marriage my wife live with me only 6month and now she gone awaye with her mom and telling to destroy my life and all plse help me
nothing to worry provided there is no wrong doing from your part be ready to establish whatever evidences particularly documentary possible to truth
WIFE FILED false 498a, 125a, 354, 506, please help, its already my second marrige, Till the date i didnt get my previous divorse, only written on stamp paper with notary i have, can she demand for intrim maintainance even she is second wife, her first marrige
Yes she can get maintenance.
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wife file 125a intrim maintenance. false illegation plz save my life
We have many kind of help available, but saving one’s life is everyone’s own responsibility.
there is no threat to your life just relax it is false case the initiator of false case to worry pl collect evidences possible to establish truth
Wife had filed cases under 498a, DV act and also had filed for Divorce.
She later withdrew the divorce case. Meanwhile, intermin maintenance was ordered in DV act.
Since there was delay in interim maintenance payments she had initiated payment recovery case. I cleared the past dues and the recovery case is closed.
I later learnt that she has been working intermittently and had received interim maintenance consealing the facts from court. I have produced company details where she is working. Even after court asking she hasn’t submitted the payslips, but just replied saying she doesn’t need maintenance anymore (but not mentioned if interim or final). Later after a LOOONNNNGG delay the court order the company and PF office for details and its clear that she claimed interim maintenance even while working
Also, she has made allegations that I assaulted her and her family members. But, I was not in town on the mentioned date, and have submitted relevant records.
My queries are:
1. Can I initiate a perjury case for the false allegations she has made regarding dowry, assault and DV?
2. Can I recover the interm maintenance paid? Had filed an application in current DV case, but was dismissed saying there is no provision to get back the interim maintenance paid. Are there other options to get back the interim maintenance paid
3. Can I recover the fees paid to my lawyers? (I don’t have formal receipts/bills)
pl concentrate on main issues which is to deal with the cases 498A D V act and collect evidences face trial prepare for examination and cross examination and forget about some money to lawyers and wife
Its nice
Collect all yur pictures of Honeymoon or etc where you go With Yur wife. Try to record the video of any massup with your wife. Try to Hack yur wife WhatsApp and collect the all Importance things that will help you to get a divorce. Don’t buy any property,loan,car etc on yur name.Many more things also there….Good luck for your future