Guidelines of WhatsApp and Facebook group and sessions

To join WhatsApp group, read below instructions carefully and follow the steps in order. Only then the joining request will be approved, else it will be ignored or your mobile number may even get blocked by WhatsApp group admin.

Guidelines of WhatsApp group for all members

STEP 1: Send documents to email id given below

Please email readable scan/image of these documents:

1. Your govt approved photo identity proof with visible picture, name, DOB. These can be PAN card, voter id, aadhaar etc

2. Mobile number (linked to your WhatsApp) bill/web account screenshot/app screenshot showing your name and mobile number. Note: Don't send any BSNL landline/Airtel landline/other landline phone bill etc, we need proof of mobile number linked to WhatsApp, not any other phone bill.

In case mobile number is not in your own name, you can send First page of petition/FIR/document if any case filed on you by wife/in-laws

TO: [email protected]
SUBJECT: <YOUR NAME> <YOUR CITY> <MOBILE NUMBER>

So example subject: Ramesh Kumar Delhi 9999999999

Even prepaid mobile numbers have this information available so no excuses about not having bill/proof of prepaid numbers is taken. Example of prepaid mobile number proof below from https://www.airtel.in/personal/myaccount/prepaid:

Similar screenshot as above for prepaid account is available below from My Airtel android app on android phones.

Other vendors like Vodafone etc also have similar website and mobile number information.

STEP 2: Send request to WhatsApp admin

Do this step only if you have sent the required documents in STEP 1 above. Else you may get blocked by WhatsApp group admin.

Message your full name/mobile number/city/profession through WhatsApp to one of the group admins at +918898944389, +917014160349, or +919845746684. In message it's a must to mention your full name/city/brief of problem/case (if any case filed yet)/profession (because no lawyers/detectives allowed in groups).

People who send just a “hi”, “hello”, “please add me to the group” without giving documents as in step 1, or full name/city/brief of problem/case will be blocked by admin. Once you get blocked, your subsequent messages will not be seen by group admin.

Naming of groups: The groups are named as MRI151, MRI153 etc. The naming convention is that MRI stands for Men Rights India, and the 15 after it stands for year 2015, and then the digit 1 is for first month of Jan in 2015. The last digit will keep changing to reflect month of the year. As of now new members are being added to MRI159 group.

STEP 3: After you join WhatsApp group

Congratulations! Once group admin approves your joining request, you can participate in the group, but there are more guidelines to follow! All these guidelines have evolved by looking at past experience where many people who joined the group but then misused/abused the privileges of group, so now it's decided that everyone has to follow them.

Note: It's mandatory to have your real first name (not fictitious name, nickname, only smileys/icons etc) in WhatsApp profile to join our WhatsApp group. Otherwise person will be removed by admin even if he has already joined. People can optionally have full name and name of city also in profile, which can be useful to connect with others in same city.

To change to full name in WhatsApp: Open WhatsApp -> Settings -> Profile -> Click on Edit icon -> Change to real first name or real full name

Anyone having a fictitious name is liable to be removed permanently without notice.

Be responsible, else be somewhere else

Not an in and out group: Getting added to the group is easy, going out of group is also easy, but getting added again after going out will not be easy! So aayaram gayaram behaviour will not be encouraged. If you left the group because you didn’t like the advice/got bored/think we are losers/ or idiots; then please take responsibility and find a better community/advisor or even advocate. There are many other forums available. Wish you better luck there! So don’t request the admins to add you again unless it’s because of phone number change or some such genuine issue.

The reason behind above is that people who are acting responsibly and maturely do not have to suffer due to others who don't. We don't buy the excuse given that we all are 'victims' of biased laws/false cases, so we should be more considerate. If we are more considerate to irresponsible people, then it creates bad precedent which creates more irresponsible behaviour, and also punishes the responsible people who may just leave the community in frustration. Also, the counsellors may also get frustrated and then there is the risk that the whole community may perish. It's better that a few disruptive members leave the group, than the admin/counsellors leave the group.

Following can lead to immediate ban without warning by any of the admins

Note: Admins being facilitators rather than watchman won’t be checking the groups for violations themselves, so any responsible group member can bring a guideline violation to their notice by sending WhatsApp message to anyone of the 2 admins. Now the responsibility has been shifted to the community members to keep things running in sane and responsible fashion. Think of it as your own group rather than admins’ group.

1. Posting something like "Why my question is not answered?", "Admin, you haven't answered my questions", etc. Admins are not basically giving legal guidance in group but facilitating discussion among community. For that purpose, you can post your question (with all important details) on Facebook group because that's the main medium for asking questions with full details.

2. Phone calling an admin out of the blue about personal case. Only Santosh and Maninder take calls, and that’s for first time only.

3. Giving suggestions to admins or other members about activism/dharna/protest without doing anything yourselves. Main purpose of groups is not activism but there is no harm discussing about it. But asking admins about "Why we are not doing protests, or organise this event, or do that?" is not to be done. Admins have done enough activism over the years and still involved in activism, it's you who are new to the 'game', and you need to contact activists in your local city, join them in weekly meetings, and contribute to activism. Details of these are shared regularly in the groups.

4. Posting pictures of your ex/current/future wife/girlfriend without any good reason.

5. Asking same question repeatedly one after other.

6. Disrespecting or Insulting the group, or the members, or admins. Better leave the group and and create your own if you are unhappy, or believe things are not up to your expectations.

7. Disrupting the group or discussions.

8. No jokes or forwards to be sent to group.

9. Suggesting 'smart' but illegal ideas like "give bribe to police/IO" etc.

Logistics on WhatsApp

Whatsapp is now also available on desktop/laptop from Chrome browser. Go to https://web.whatsapp.com if you prefer laptop access.

Santosh is the coordinator in Whatsapp groups as of now. If you have a complain about any group member’s behaviour, you can send private message to either of them.

Especially when multiple people are posting at same time: To address someone, you can use initials of name, like RK for Ramesh Kumar, SP for Santosh Patil etc. That’s important because when multiple people are posting at same time, it becomes difficult to follow which message is reply to what else. It can become very confusing otherwise.

We discourage calling anyone as sir in group. Reason being that people should aim to become self-reliant, if we keep calling others as Sir or senior, then we may never take full responsibility of our own cases and own life. Because the sir or senior (or even own advocate) is convenient scapegoat to take the blame if things don’t turn out right! No one’s a guru to anyone else, and everyone should aim to become their own guru. No one else should be our mai-baap. This is also based on experience of having observed people over many years.

Guidelines for Facebook group

1. It is highly recommended to have a clearly visible picture of yourselves (with face shown) as your Facebook profile picture. Having anything else as profile pic could result in delay or declining of your approval to join group.

2. After you are approved to the Facebook group, you have to call one of verifying admin team within 15 days so the admins can verify the person. Those who don't call will be removed and permanently blocked from joining group again. Thereafter, for all members who are mostly inactive in group, will need to call a verifying admin every 3 months (you can set a 3 months repeating reminder etc in calendar). The numbers of verifying admins are given inside Facebook group.

3. Any of admins can call the mobile number given in registration form to verify the person. If the number is incorrect or some other issue with real identity of person, the person will be removed and blocked from group. This call from admin is separate from that which you need to call within 15 days, and every 3 months thereafter if inactive in group.

4. Same guidelines as for WhatsApp group above are applicable for Facebook group too. And in addition follow below guidelines too:

5. Do not tag any group admin to get reply to your post or comment. This is pure community, no one here is a service provider who is liable to reply or guarantee a reply within 24 hours etc. You can use @ with admin name in comment but make sure it doesn't get auto-converted into a tag. People who violate this may be blocked for minimum 48 hours or whatever time admin thinks necessary. Repeated violations (like twice) may lead to remove and permanent blocking of member.

How to post a personal case/question on Facebook?

People can post their question using "Write Post" OR "Ask Question"

1. Full case details (single post forever)

This will be most important post made by you to get guidance from others so read carefully. For advice and comments by others on your full situation and full case details, use below standard format, and admins themselves will give less priority to those questions not using this format:

(Password is MRI)

http://menrightsindia.net/format-of-situationcase-for-discu…

Further updates to your situation must be posted as new comment in above post thread. *New post should not be made.* If you forget to use above format and post details in your own free flow format, then that will become the only thread on which others can see your situation details, so it's in your own interest not to take it lightly.

This post and thread will never be deleted

2. Specific questions of law, procedures etc (one post per issue)

For question about specific court procedure, doubt, or question of law etc (which doesn't need context of your full case details), write fresh post because that point is independent of your case details and can be of interest to and learning for others too.

Useful judgments can also be posted as an independent post.

These posts will never be deleted

3. Other posts

The main purpose of group is covered by 2 types of posts earlier, and other posts like some recent news etc can be made however they may get deleted after few days once people have seen them. This is to keep the group clean where people can find things easily (including their own previous posts). Wider Facebook, Twitter, blogging etc can be used by those who are keen on activism and spreading awareness.

Avoid these in posts

1. Avoid generic sentences "Please help me" or "What should I do?" at end of post with full case details. The group is made with purpose to help each other, and it's not a mai-baap style group anyway that acting helpless or confused will get anyone better attention or help. General points and strategy are already covered on http://menrightsindia.net. Please read those and prepare a strategy first, and ask specific doubts here. "What should I do" can become an opinion poll where one blind man is led by other blind men.

2. If someone asks a question but hides or forgets to mention important details for whatever reason, then please be responsible if later people find out about it, and don't think it's worthwhile to comment on your situation. This is all the more reason to follow the standard format of details.

3. Bring-back-wife-how-to-safeguard: Also for those who want to bring back wife after she has already gone to police, court etc once; take full responsibility and don't expect group to know how to safeguard or save you later. Usually these wives never come back or even if they come, they come back only to file cases again with hopefully more convincing story (you can see real examples below). So please take your own risks and don't ask us ways on how to safeguard if I want to bring wife back. Because even though you may record things when wife has come back, such evidence most likely will not be able to prevent filing of fresh cases/allegations; all it can be useful for is to disprove allegations at trial stage. Read this post for more details: http://menrightsindia.net/2016/04/how-to-safeguard-from-false-cases-by-wifepart-1.html

Basic Homework: read bare acts, important posts on MRI

Before posting on Facebook, always read the bare act of any topic you want to discuss. Bare acts are given end of this post. E.g. if your RTI is refused, then read up the bare act of that section under which it was refused. If you want to discuss a point under CrPC 125, then read CrPC 125 bare act fully first. If you have filed Sec 9 of HMA (RCR), then read on RCR first. If you have filed divorce based on cruelty, then read those sections of HMA first. Most of the time people don’t read up the sections and are misguided by lawyers very easily. Simply by firing questions without understanding is not going to work. Take 100% responsibility.

Quick link to important posts on MRI

http://menrightsindia.net/important-posts