Cross examination is probably the most important stage where false cases filed by wives can get demolished – and at the end of it what looked like kevlar plated armour of a wife’s case looks worse than torn underwear. The gynocentric and women-protecting System will always try not to let the cases reach this stage and which is the reason the so called counselling by CAW/mahila thana etc, mediations in DV or in family courts are preferred routes to nip the possibility of any fight being put up by husband in the bud. He is given the carrot of mutual consent divorce and withdrawal of all cases in return for settlement money to wife. What all ‘justice’ can’t a bunch of money buy?
For those who have decided to go beyond the initial pain and uncertainty and willing to run it like a marathon rather than a sprint, cross-examination stage is the first stage where wife’s evidence is called into questioning and probing for inconsistencies, lies and contradictions.
Importance of various stages – Written Statement, Cross-Examination, Own Evidence, Final Arguments
Note: in this article, our area of discussion is the full trial of case proper e.g. CrPC 125, DV Act, Divorce, RCR case etc rather than about interim maintenance and other orders which do not follow the complete procedure of Civil or criminal procedure code. For interim orders, one can do interim arguments based on basic evidence at hand and call into doubt OP’s allegations and petition.
Before we get into some techniques of cross-examination, it’s better to lay stress that all of stages like Written Statement(WS)/Objection by husband, Cross-exam of wife, his own Evidence, and Final Arguments are very important. Each stage builds on the previous one and it becomes easier and more automatic as the case progresses since good foundation and structure has been laid in previous stages.
A good WS/objection lays the foundation of further fight whereas a weak objection statement gives more confidence to OP (Opposite Party) that the husband has been lulled into the settlement and mediation mode and with some right moves he can be psychologically pressured and brought down in the next so called mediation. Whereas a strong and detailed WS with possibly counter allegations (true of course) sets the stage that the fight has just entered round one, and husband is ready to fight for full 12 rounds. Those readers who don’t like the use of word fight may as well stop reading further. For them the time of mediation and settlement will come soon and their main concern should be how to collect 35 lakh or whatever amount wife is asking for, so they can re-activate their (second)shaadi.com profile for second marriage!
After husband’s WS is filed in court, usually if an interim application is filed by either side (mostly by wife for interim maintenance), it gets decided first before the stage of Evidence of wife comes up. As already discussed on this site, one should fight interim maintenance as if one’s life depends on it and take things easy only after interim maintenance has been either zeroed or reduced to a nominal amount. It does not mean however to escape one’s responsibility from child maintenance (not having kids is the only honourable route for that), as some morons seem to be concluding after doing cursory reading on this site.
After interim applications for maintenance or child visitation, any petition amendments etc are disposed, the time comes for wife’s evidence. Most likely she will produce the same set of lies and concocted stories as in her petition as her evidence affidavit.
Once wife submits evidence, one should be ready with cross-examination questions which should preferably be prepared by you and then only discussed with lawyer for additions/modifications.
After cross-examination of wife, you will submit your evidence where you can further cover things which are in same line as in your WS. You should not make evidence affidavit very different from WS – remember that structure can’t deviate too much from foundation. The main difference between Evidence Affidavit and WS is that in WS stage you deny wife’s false allegations, and also state your own points and allegations, and in evidence stage you get to submit original documents and other records like photos, messages, videos, emails etc which prove your statements and and poke holes in wife’s allegations.
Then comes the stage of your /husband’s cross-examination by OP advocate.
Once the stages so far have been done properly, preparing final arguments will be an automatic and easy thing. It is advised by few (though most advocates won’t do it for lack of time) to submit written arguments and not just argue verbally, and I advice that too. The simple reason is that how many things a judge will remember from one case to another that he/she would remember what was argued verbally in your case in previous hearing few weeks back!
Now we will look at preparing for wife’s cross-examination. Some of the points may be similar across all cases, but some points will vary depending on maintenance vs child custody case, so will divide it into sections based on topic.
Cross-Examination of wife in maintenance cases
In India, interim-maintenance and maintenance is the fuel on which the divorce and DV industry runs. Trying to cut this fuel supply is the best way to get an upper hand, get psychological boost, gain confidence, and an eventual win in the cases. Even in real wars, rivals gave special consideration and planned on how to cut off food/ration, fuel, and other supplies of opponents as a way to gain an upper hand and ultimately lead to a win.
Situation: Wife is qualified but she has not mentioned anything about it in her petition or evidence
Danger: abla-naari may be deemed unfit to get employed anywhere and poor husband will be bearing high maintenance for her.
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Cross-exam questions to elicit educational qualifications
- What are your educational qualifications?
- From which college/institution did you do your XYZ course?
- What was the year when you passed out?
- etc etc
Cross-exam questions to elicit wife’s independent nature and non-abla-naari status:
- Did you study in XYZ college?
- Was that college in your hometown or outside?
- Assuming it was outside: Did you stay in a hostel then?
- Assuming it was in same city: How far was the college from your home? How did you reach college and back home from college? If she says she went by bus, then ask: Did anyone accompany you in the bus like your father etc? If she says no, then you can use that as argument later that if she can finish 3-4 years college course and travel in bus on her own everyday; what stops her applying, taking up a job, and travel by bus on her own now? Has she lost her ability to move out of home, go in bus/auto whatever, do productive things simply because she got married?
What we are trying to elicit above is to show the court that wife had lived outside home for 3-4 years while training on a professional degree/course. If she is independent enough to live away from home in a hostel/PG etc, then it is evident that she is educated and independent enough to find a job and maintain herself on her own than live like a parasite on husband. Wiping the abla-naari label is the objective here.
Assuming wife lies about her educational qualifications, then her marriage bio-data, online profile, such sources will come handy to either further cross-exam her on the spot, or submit them later as part of your evidence exhibits. The choice of marking that exhibit during wife’s cross-exam vs submit own evidence exhibit is a judgment based on situation.
Cross-exam questions to tackle non-working wife (who left work after marriage)
One of the chief problems in maintenance cases is that well-qualified and women working before marriage promptly leave their job after marriage, and probably take a silent vow to never do any paid work outside home again. Their probable dream is to file cases on husband and live off husband’s earnings while escaping any duties of a wife.
The problem is also exacerbated by the fact that many Indian men are living in the fantasy land that their wife if confined to household and future motherhood duties instead of working outside, then she will be a modern version of of Sati-Savitri. The confusion is probably about the cause and effect. It may be true that many Sati-Savitris of the past were housewives, but simply being a housewife doesn’t a Sati-Savitri make, else a Kaikeyi could also fit into that role. So one should drop this idea that a housewife can be easily controlled and a working woman may become too independent and may not care much about husband. The data and statistics clearly show that vast majority (probably 80-85%) of maintenance cases are filed by women who are not working outside home at the time. So not working outside home cannot be assumed to be a barometer of being an easily controlled wife. If they were so easily controlled by being housewives, then why did they drag husband into police station and various courts?
Now Questions:
- Here first you need to finish up the questions already above about wife’s educational qualifications, living in hostel vs bus to college. Having built that base, further questions below.
- Is it true that you were working in xyz company and drawing salary of abc per month? Assuming this fact was in her marriage bio-data or verbally told, there is high likelihood she will admit and say yes. Remember they are usually over-confident that now that they are housewives, no one can make them work ever again! But if she lies even about work before marriage, you have to elicit the truth in another way. (Hint: Evidence)
- For how many years/months did you work? (This is just a basic data point type of question)
- How many employees were there in that company? Here one has to exercise judgment and ask such questions especially if the company is a large company, or well-known company, or MNC brand company etc. But if wife had worked in a 6 people office, then this may not be so important.
- Did you go through an test and interview process before employment? It may seem very common sense type of question, but the argument we need to make later is: if she can take a 3-4 years college degree, and apply for job and go through test and interviews, and get job and if she can do it once, why can’t she do it again now? Facts of her educational qualifications, ability to get a job, and ability to do a job is being established at the end of these questions.
Cross-examination questions to tackle domestic violence type allegations whether in DV, CrPC 125, Divorce or any other law not yet passed
Situation: Wife alleges in her petition that she was not given food (a copy-paste favourite allegation)
Before I put down some questions, a general point is in order that sometimes one need not question mechanically on every allegation, but depending on the scale of joke-worthiness vs danger-score of the allegation, one can either do a routine question “I suggest to you that you have made a false statement/allegation that xyz happened”. Replace xyz with “I was not given food”, “I was locked in the bathroom” type of joke-worthy allegations. A decision whether an allegation is joke-worthy or damage-causing depends on the overall context also. A formula can’t be given.
Cross-exam questions to counter wife’s statement that she was not given food
Let’s take example where wife is housewife.
- Were you staying at home while your husband was at office? She will say yes, what else she will say that she was out shopping with girlfriends?
- Is it correct to say that the house was a 2 bedroom house with a separate kitchen. Again yes.
- Did you have access to the kitchen during the day? Here the wife may get a hint that things are not going her way and she may either say yes and get demolished on further questions, or try to act smart and try to change her version from statements made in petition. Either way it is simple matter to poke harpoon sized holes in her allegations by now. It’s very easy to say “I was not given food”, but what stopped her from preparing and having food when there was a kitchen and food supplies at home with unrestricted access during the day!
Cross-exam questions to counter wife’s statement that she was locked in the bathroom
By now the eternal questioning-types and doubters may start asking but what if my wife says that she was locked in the bathroom, so she could not go to the kitchen etc etc. Eternal doubters can’t be satisfied, but here are some questions to demolish the “locked in bathroom” and “I was restricted from going out” type of allegations.
- Do you have a mobile phone? Yes.
- Is you mobile phone number dddddddddd? Yes
- You have stated in para 3 of petition that you were locked in bathroom. Can you tell on what date it happened and what was the time? Dates and times are the last things on minds of wives or their advocates when they write petitions because they hope to wrap up things by counselling/mediation stage into MCD and settlement. Expect some “I don’t remember exactly” and such type of evasive answers.
- Did you call anyone about the incident afterwards? If she says that she did not call anyone, then ask her why did you not call? She won’t be able to give any good reason so it can then be suggested that she did not call because such an incident never happened. If she says that she called her mother, then knowing the date/time asked earlier can nail her lie if she didn’t. Getting itemized phone bills is most helpful in such situations since it nails the lie and puts a cannon size hole in wife’s overall case.
Cross-examination in criminal cases like IPC 498A/406/354
To be written…
Cross-exam questions to counter wife’s dowry allegations
To be written…
Cross-exam questions to counter wife’s stridhan/jewellery with in-laws allegations
To be written…
Further cross-exam points to be written … (ask in comments if you want to know how to ask cross-examination questions on a specific situation).
Disclaimer: I’m not a lawyer
Rahul says
August 5, 2019 at 10:46 pmTo All MEN: If you are getting help from this forum, your wife or daughter in law or her relatives are also getting smart. With your every query they are also learning. It’s important you become smarter and learn laws.
for exampleF,
I have read at many places that ask question if she has reported the matter to someone or police before filing the petition/FIR or incident alleged. Women are also learning from these blogs and getting smart that they dial PCR to record some matter (real or with exaggeration) before and even continue after filing the petiition whenever your cross path with her
videv says
August 17, 2019 at 9:37 pmThis reminds me of a friend in school time, who used to mug up answers before a test from the previous years’ test questions. Before one such test, he said: “I know all the answers, I just don’t know which answer belongs to which question!”
Dialling PCR or 100 is not a routine affair. Every call gets recorded and a docket number is generated. In fact it is possible to get the transcript of call through RTI by filing it on police wireless dept (but within few months of call only). Any woman who tries to create a fake record or tries to pass of a call to 100 by itself as evidence of wrongdoing by husband and his relatives, can land in soup but ONLY IF the husband side is smart and don’t try to think of cross-exam as a set of template questions to ask in a routine manner.
reddy says
November 6, 2018 at 4:53 pmhi, i have filed a case against my wife is fall under cruality, case is my wife have the sexual relation before the marriage and continuing after marriage also, i met that guy he gave all the evidences like call recordings between both of them, photos kissing each other, chat history, and i have whats up chat and call records where my wife confirmed relation with that person,
coming to the point now i have cross examination by opposite lawyer, i have filed a case and i am the petitioner here, could you please tell me what kind of questions i can expect from OP lawyer, all evidences are very genuine.
your answer is very much useful for me…
thanks
videv says
November 22, 2018 at 10:31 pm>>your answer is very much useful for me…
Of course, but MOST divorce seekers don’t help others, or grateful even after getting free help. So go somewhere else.
GAURANG says
September 6, 2018 at 12:17 pmWHICH QUESTIONS SHOULD BE ASK TO PETITIONER/WIFE ? HER ALLEGATION ARE WANTING A CAR BY HUSBAND & CASH BY HUSBAND… SIR PLEASE HELP ME WHICH QUESTIONS ASK HER TO PROVE HER ALLEGATION IS FALSE.
videv says
September 7, 2018 at 3:04 pmThe onus of proving allegation is on petitioner/complainant wife. If she gives some reasonable proof (e.g. an SMS or whatsapp message by you asking for car or cash as dowry), only then the onus will shift on you. One can make routine suggestion to wife that “your allegation about demand of cash/car is false” and let her reply be recorded in her cross-exam.
It is unfortunate the advocates have added to the fear creation by making unsophisticated statements like “law is in favour of women”, so people think that they have to prove wife’s allegation as false in order to prove innocence. Most things verbally said between any two people (and not limited to just husband and wife) without a third party corroboration cannot be proven either true or false! If a husband still faces a harsh or adverse order, it’s not because of bias in law but because of lack of application of mind by a particular judge in that particular case.
Anamika says
July 30, 2018 at 5:31 pmIN WIFE’S EVIDENCE SHE MAKE FALSE ALLEGATION ON HUSBAND THAT HE HAD AN AFFAIR BEFORE MARRIAGE AND CONTINUE EVEN AFTER MARRIAGE. SHE HAS NOT FILED ANY EVIDENCE IN SUPPORT OF HER THIS ALLEGATION. HOW TO CROSS-EXAMINE HER ON THIS POINT.
Bharath says
July 17, 2019 at 8:56 pmBurden of proof lies on petitioner/wife.
Rohan J says
June 15, 2018 at 11:55 pmDear Sir, I have applied for divorce and soon I will be cross-examined. I have passed the stage of interim maintenance and no cross examination was done during that. I am paying a maintenance of 15K/month to her now.
I do not have any other cases filed against me as of yet.
Most of the cross-examination articles that I see are for the wife (asking the wife). Are there any blogs or articles or information on what to take care of when the husband will be cross-examined first. My ground for asking divorce is mental cruelty. What kind of questions can the OP lawyer ask me?
She stayed with me for the first year. Later she left for 2 years and now came back again and sticking to me like a parasite. We do not have have any relations (no talking or looking at each other) between us for the past 1.5 years although we stay in the same house. In her WS she has prayed that she should never be asked to leave the house.
I am already on your FB group.
Regards,
videv says
June 16, 2018 at 12:09 amyou are no longer part of FB group now.
Rohan J says
August 3, 2018 at 10:56 pmOk. It seems I was removed due to inactivity on my part. Would it still be possible to get a reply here on what kind of questions to expect from OP lawyer, since I am the petitioner here applying for divorce. Most of my points are on mental cruelty and her rude and erratic behavior.
videv says
August 3, 2018 at 11:00 pmNo divorce questions
B Pratap says
January 28, 2018 at 5:35 pmHello,
I want some advise but before that I will share the stage of my cases.
She left me around 4 years back and after waiting for one year I applied for the divorce. She filed the DV case and a dowry complaint in return gift in 2017
Court has ordered me to pay 21k/pm as interim maintenance in HMA u/s24 since the date of applicatin May 2015.
She (wife) is a qualified engineer and Master in Hospital Admin. and has also done another master’s diploma after marriage.
She had been working and earning around 25k and now has been terminated from the service per her affidavit.
She has filed application for the execution of IM.
Now I’ve a hearing for the DV case where also argument for the maintenance going to happen and she has asked for 30k pm.
Though she is qualified and capable of earning, Court has considered her as ABLA nari and asked me to pay for her leisure time.
Can someone please advise what should be the course of action in DV case now?
videv says
January 30, 2018 at 11:06 amwhole website is filled with advice on similar situations. What special thing do you need? 21 k p.m is on the high side, so it could mean you are earning well. Ultimately the only way to defeat the “standard of living” argument is to bring out wife’s earning, challenge on why she left job, and last resort offer to judge that IM be awarded only for 6 months while she searches for job (and gives that proof to court) and by that time finds another job.
Ankit says
December 21, 2017 at 3:40 amHow to cross that she was forced to leave job by parents and husband and thereafter maid was removed and she was made to do all the work
• Is it correct to say that the house that you stayed with your husband was a 3 bedroom apartment
o Did only you and your husband lived there?
o Did you have access to kitchen and all the portions of house during the stay at house
o You stayed in that house with your husband for 5 months. Was your husband ever late in paying rent
o You had a maid initially. What did the maid take care of
o How much did she charge for same
videv says
December 26, 2017 at 8:55 pmAlmost every wife who quits job voluntarily still tells the court that she was forced to leave job. You can tackle that by focusing on the circumstances after marriage (did she move to another city with you?), and previous job profile, salary (higher the better) etc.
The maid question has to be dealt directly. If the maid was there always, then you can try providing proof of salary payment (cash normally, so difficult), or entries of maid incoming/outgoing in some entry register etc if living in apartment etc. If the maid was actually removed, you have to come up with reasonable explanation for that.
Deepak says
October 31, 2017 at 5:12 pmSir,
I have filed for Divorce in 2012 after which she filed 498a in her hometown in 2013. We got discharged on point of jurisdiction. She filed DVC & MC in 2016 in same court in which we are now facing trail. Her cross examination and evidence stage is over. Now, Its my turn to be cross examined by OP lawyer. Can you list out desirable and effective answers to expected questions from OP lawyer regarding dowry, harassment,etc.
videv says
November 7, 2017 at 4:30 pmIf you state the truth then there is nothing to worry about. Your replies should be in line with your own Objections/evidence submitted. Mostly the questions are yes/no and nothing difficult to handle if you stick to your Objections/evidence documents.
Ranjan says
August 5, 2017 at 10:33 pmI went through most of the posts in this blog and I have a pretty straight-forward question (whose answer I couldn’t find anywhere). Before asking the question, let me explain my situation:
I am from Bihar, working as Software engg. in Bangalore. I got married to a feminist girl having matriarchal family [Her dad passed away long back]. She stayed with my parents in our Bihar home for 17 days after marriage and thereafter we (My wife and I) came to Bangalore.
She stayed with me for 4 days after which she left the city in my absence and went to her home. So altogether she lived for 21 days with me and my family.
Afterwards, I have facebook chat record with her saying that I sexually harassed her and I forced her to have sex without her consent. No other allegation of dowry or DV.
My next steps are as follows:
1. File a FIR with CJM court. [This is what 2 advocates in my small home town suggested]
2. Get her and my family members together sign on “socially-accepted-divorce-agreement” .I know there is no such thing but this is what her family wants.
3. Immediately after this I file restitution of conjugal rights (Section 9)
4. Wait and watch. She’s not anyway coming back. Let them file a divorce petition or after 1 year we’ll file it.
My question is: Will she still be able to file false 498a and/or DV cases while steps 2, 3 or 4 if going on or pending?
As for the alimony/maintenance, I did little homework here, she was before marriage and is still working.
videv says
August 8, 2017 at 7:40 pmI haven’t seen anyone yet doing what you have done. Filing RCR is favourite suggestion, but filing FIR on woman is unheard. “Socially accepted divorce agreement”, what a joke! She will claim later you forced her to agree to it, and no one will bat an eyelid. Just hope your lawyers are super-smart and they know what they are doing.
>>Will she still be able to file false 498a and/or DV cases while steps 2, 3 or 4 if going on or pending?
Yes, because each FIR/criminal/civil case runs independently. In fact, filing RCR is the guaranteed formula to get multiple cases filed on you by wife. Maybe that’s what your lawyers are also hoping.
M.Raja says
June 24, 2017 at 9:39 pmyour article is highly useful and clear basic doubts in matrimonial disputes thanks
pradip kr saha says
June 22, 2017 at 12:04 amreally it is helpful for me as my wife has filed false case against me in district court.
s.k.chaudhry says
June 10, 2017 at 9:06 pmthe menace of false and fake complaints is rising day by day,govt.is not able to make it compoundable,bailable with fine punishment due to women groups.
Hence mass action is required otherwise men will suffer and troll,so groups in every state be made with advocates as members and local aid be availab le to victim
fund can be contributed.
Anis says
March 2, 2017 at 4:58 pmHello,
I followed same thing during cross examination in 125 , question list was prepared by me and had detail discussion with my lawyer for same. And we finally made short list of questions.
One good example , I want to share here.
Like my wife asked to 150k (1.5 lac) / month under 125. Here are list of questions asked to her for deciding her requirements.
1) Please tell name of place/city where you are living now.
2) Do you have any brother sisters living with you or all are married ? (Distraction question)
3) How you define “Your city” , like village ,taluka, district, city or metro ?
4) Is there any good hotels in your city like 5 * or something like that ?
5) What is population of your living place ?
6) Is there any medical treatment going on ? (she 99% says , as she want to convince that she is doing great with her parents )
7) What is income of your brother/sister/father ?
8) Are they able to fulfill all their family requirements with that ?
9) Why you need 150k/month ? where you family can survive with this amount ? (master stroke)
10) How will you spend all those money ? what is per capita income of your city ?
11) What is per capita income of India ?
You can confuse by asking more questions.
videv says
March 2, 2017 at 6:05 pmNice!
Keerthi says
January 17, 2017 at 12:40 pmDear sir
Thanks for the insightful article about “How to tackle the false 498A cases.”
The question that you are given is very useful in the court.
Can you please share the same for the false dowry allegations like husband asked money, house in the form of dowry. In my case it is more prominent allegations against me and my family.
Thanks in advance.
YKumar says
January 5, 2017 at 10:54 amDear Sir, I have been reading your books for the past six months and they help me get through a lot being a layman. I don’t want to waste your time as your credentials are already well established.
You said in a para “It does not mean however to escape one’s responsibility from child maintenance (not having kids is the only honourable route for that), as some morons seem to be concluding after doing cursory reading on this site.”
I agree with your observation. I paid for my two children’s maintenance and schooling for one year until she got a job and then she threw a DV Case on me and my family after which I stopped paying as I didn’t know what else to do! The lawyer wants the IM to be paid in court once it comes to that stage, but I see that the case hasn’t moved due to various reasons like change of court, etc. etc., that it’s still at the WS stage after 9 months!
I just wanted your take on this.
Once again, great job, Sir.
videv says
January 5, 2017 at 12:47 pm>> I paid for my two children’s maintenance and schooling for one year until she got a job
Wife having job may reduce her maintenance to even zero, but for children it can only mean financial responsibility to be shared between husband-wife in proportion to income.
What lawyer is saying may be correct in a legal sense regarding interim maintenance, but this approach doesn’t have any plan or thinking about child access to father. And if you ask for interim custody and visitation etc, then again the question will be asked if you are financially supporting the children or not. It’s better approach to fight wife’s maintenance application strongly but be ready and pro-active to share for children’s expenses like school fees by paying directly to school or whatever feasible approach can be worked out in court. Also de-link and create separate bank account for children so those funds can’t be taken by wife. You will have to push lawyer for this, their approach is one maintenance amount to wife and she gets to decide what portion gets spent on what. Effectively by that she gets sole guardianship rights too, because father only pays and have no say or even knowledge of how that money is being spent on children.
For more you have to join the groups.
sami says
January 4, 2017 at 4:30 pmThese are very precise questions being asked nowadays. Thanks. Could you also please add about false allegations of being beaten/scolded etc by husband
nvj says
April 19, 2018 at 1:05 amdate, time and place are material question for beating, and scolding like:
on which date you were beaten?
at what time?
where?
THEN ASK THE OPPONENT IS GOING TO JOB/BUSINESS FROM — MORNING TO —-EVENING?
if yes then ask so you are telling lie about beating, scolding.
and more questions like:- was there any one present when you were being beaten by opponent?
if yes ask names?
have they help you to save from opponent?
have you complained for it earlier at any time?( means before filing this application)
have you reported for that to your parents?
What they advised you at that time? etc are the common questions
AMAN KONARK MODI says
January 4, 2017 at 3:56 pmGOOD KEEP IT UP AND POST
Edgar Albuquerque says
January 3, 2017 at 11:27 pmSir /Madam,
I would like to put forward my case before you for assistance and advice.
….deleted…
videv says
January 5, 2017 at 12:36 pmOnly queries regarding cross-examination will be taken in this post. Join groups for advice.
khush says
January 3, 2017 at 7:16 pmthanks for this article, plz tell some tactics for cross examination of wife for allegations of giving dowry articles in marriage, and dowry articles with in-laws/husband .
these are allegations on me, any cross examination of wife is fixed on 24th january.