What is the official definition of mediation/counselling in CAW cells?
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The official version of what mediation or counselling at CAW cell can be gleaned from this excerpt from page 2 of Standing Order 281 of Delhi Police which brought CAW cells into existence:
Mediation (Counselling) The objective of this mediation cell is to give a platform to warring parties to settle their differences through the intervention of trained mediators. A mediation Cell of the Delhi High Court Legal Services Authority is also running in the CWC premises. The objective of this mediation cell is to give a platform to warring parties to settle their differences through the intervention of trained mediators with an objective of reducing the litigation and offering solutions outside the court. This unit is headed by an Assistant Commissioner of Police and assisted by other officers. Other districts can also refer the cases to this mediation cell by forwarding a copy of complaint with a consent form signed by both the parties giving their willingness for opting for mediation.
Above information should be kept in mind, but unfortunately, the official information may not turn out to be of much use to husbands and family facing CAW cell. Just one example is given below on why the credibility of CAW cells is questionable:
Here is a 2019 case where a whole Mahila Thana with 48 women and 2 men employees was shunted out because of quarrel over distribution over bribe money between sub-inspector and her superior!: https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/meerut/entire-mahila-thana-shunted-out-after-si-takes-poison-over-distribution-of-bribe-money/articleshow/70681362.cms
Delhi High Court judgments on CAW Cell procedures and powers
Before we go into real life guidelines on how to handle CAW cell if you are a husband, following important points should be kept in mind which are based on Delhi High Court judgments on various aspects of CAW cells.
1. CAW cell is meant to safeguard marriage so FIR should not be registered immediately.
2. CAW cell cannot investigate and examine evidence.
3. CAW Cell is only a conciliatory body, cannot compel persons to appear before it.
4. CAW Cell can recommend Closure Report if no merit found in wife’s complaint.
The gist of above judgments is that CAW cell is not meant to register immediately an FIR upon wife’s complaint to them because their job is to facilitate conciliation if possible.
They cannot investigate on the complaint like it’s done on an FIR and hence giving evidence in your favour may be useful only to the extent of negotiating things with wife and it won’t stop further proceedings in future like formal registration of FIR.
The most interesting but not known point is that CAW cell cannot compel you to appear in front of them (even if they send written notice), so if you are prepared to face the FIR which mostly happens anyway, you could skip attending any of CAW counselling sessions. This could be useful for some men who are prepared to to fight Legal Terrorism sooner rather than later and they could save a few months in the process, too.
Finally, in last of above 4 judgments, a husband got a closure report after CAW cell but such a happy scenario is rarely heard – so I won’t suggest to place too much hopes based on just one such case.
Real life guidelines on how to handle counselling in CAW cells
1. CAW (Crime Against Women) cell conducts so called counselling, where basically they put pressure on husband to either agree to wife’s demands (e.g. for living in separate house from husband’s parents), or else be ready for FIR on himself and other family members.
2. Based on experiences by almost every husband, a husband should not try to get sympathy or fair hearing (sunwai) from police – it will never happen so if one is ready with that expectation then one will not feel dejected or disheartened. Also, police may ignore all evidence shown by husband, so again have low expectations. No need to bribe the police and trying all kinds of setting and jugaad type approaches – because that’s how corrupt elements in police get the habit of persecuting people and getting bribes. Moreover, there is little evidence that bribing police works at all for husbands.
2. Most of counselling sessions fail, and get converted into FIR under section 498A/406 etc. 498A FIRs are quite common, so don’t panic and make any hasty decisions out of fear. Do not admit to any false allegation made by wife under pressure. Do not sign anything which can be used against you in a court or a legal mediation as an admission of guilt or wrongdoing.
Ask for written notice
3. Even for attending CAW cell, you should ask for written notice for counselling session. Once FIR is done, It’s mandatory for police to send written notice under CrPC 41 to call accused, so don’t go to PS just based on phone call.
Read about CrPC 41 below:
Now CAW cell is a pre-FIR stage so some people may say that written notice can be done away with – “it’s just counselling”, “we are only trying to understand the matrimonial issue between husband and wife”, and so on. The problem is how many in police use the CAW cell proceedings as a way to test psychology and mental toughness of husbands and their families – with a view to getting bribes (read above news). If you start going to CAW cell based on phone call once, they will do it again and again because it makes job of unscrupulous police persons easier! Also, if you are going to CAW without written notice, what ready proof do you have if you want to claim later (say in any court or legal proceeding) that you had gone to CAW cell on so and so dates?
4. Especially if you are coming from another city, you should not go to CAW cell without written notice. Many a time, a trap is laid for innocent husband when he goes to police/CAW for counselling and the opposite wife/in-law gang will assault him near the police station or another place, and they will immediately file complaint to police that it is the husband who threatened and assaulted them. This alleged incident will then be used to create jurisdiction for IPC 498A case in wife’s city. If husband goes carrying a written notice, then husband will have a good reason and document to say that he has come to attend CAW cell counselling and not for any other purpose.
Dealing with counselling sessions
5. Typical complaint points made by rogue and #LegalTerrorism kind of wives to CAW cell are that husband is not caring, she is being suppressed, husband’s parents are torturing her, she is ready to live with husband if he takes a separate house from his parents, and so on. There will be many glaring contradictions in the complaint like any good CAW cell complaint, so one should prepare with the mindset how to handle this “beginning of the end” rather than with hope of reconciliation etc, which almost never works out even if it happens. Most of the time in such temporary reconciliations, the husband takes up a separate house to live with wife – only to be making rounds of police stations again within 6 months time! Note: if anyone has any statistical data/RTI reply about number of reconciliations vs number of total CAW complaints which can contradict my claim, then feel free to comment on this article alongwith link to copy of that statistics/RTI reply etc.6. Most counselling may extend up to 3 sessions, but sometimes it has been reported that husband has gone to CAW cell even for 6-7 times!6. Ask for copy of wife’s complaint. In the grand Indian police tradition, it will be refused citing that this is a counselling so copy of complaint need not be given. In any case, you can file RTI on the same CAW police station later to get a copy of the complaint.
7. Do not sign anything which can be used against you in a court or a legal mediation as an admission of guilt or wrongdoing. If you do give a signed statement, then ask for a copy of that with some official acknowledgment/ seal of CAW PS etc. If they don’t give you that copy, then you can include that too in your RTI application. If you made to sign something under force or pressure, then immediately file a written complaint to State Human Rights Commission about violation of your human rights to life and liberty. Only by doing such actions, this tendency of corrupt police elements will get curbed over time.
List of Articles/Stridhan/Recovery of Articles
8. This is the most important business conducted during CAW cell proceedings. Most often, the CAW cell proceeding is used by rogue wives to both make claims to an inflated list of jewellery as their stridhan which was never given to them, and also to use this police based ‘counselling’ to test her husband and in-laws’ mental strength – done with the hope that they will crumble at the first test itself and succumb to her extortionary demands.
9. So a list of articles will be most likely given to husband in 2nd or 3rd session – with the expectation that he should file a written reply with a list of his own about wife’s articles/jewellery in his/family’s possession which is he expected to return to wife as per law. Before accepting wife’s list one should check that it should be properly addressed to a CAW official and not just a piece of paper and should be properly signed by wife along
with name and address. There is no need to argue or get perturbed about the wrong or inflated list of items in that list of articles given by wife.
with name and address. There is no need to argue or get perturbed about the wrong or inflated list of items in that list of articles given by wife.
10. In next CAW session, you can give your own list of articles which are supposed to belong to wife as per law about stridhan (read Dowry, Stridhan article on this site to learn what constitutes stridhan). Your reply statement can include this point that you are willing to return the items provided wife can produce the bills for the jewellery items gifted to her by her parents. Most of the time the wives will not produce any bills. In case she does give bills, you can later go to that shop for verification whether it is a genuine bill or not. Many husbands have been able to successfully file complaint with sales/tax department for non-genuine bill given by jewellery shop to such wives! Attack is the Best Defence.
11. People including some legal and no so legal experts may advise you to agree to wife’s list of articles, else you will have difficulty in getting anticipatory bail. None of that has to do with how law is supposed to work – so if you fall for such supposed ‘legal hacks’, then you are only yourselves to be blamed. Instead, read about Arnesh Kumar vs State of Bihar judgment and CrPC 41 articles on this site. You should give your own list of articles based on what is actually in your/family’s possession, without worrying about what wife has mentioned in her list.
12. It is very common to hear that wife has taken not only her own stridhan jewellery, but also husband’s mother’s jewellery when she decamped from husband’s house! Now for some advice which even lawyers are not giving to husbands: your mother’s jewellery is your mother’s stridhan, and no one including your wife has any legal right to that stridhan. So your mother (she only) has full legal right to file IPC 406 criminal case on wife to recover her stridhan from your wife. Refer to article on this site about How to file criminal FIR/complaint case if police refuses to register it.
Safety and Protection before and after CAW cell counselling
13. Based on experience, once a complaint has gone to CAW cell, you can write on a piece of paper that one day the marriage is going to officially end – which of course doesn’t mean that you will be given or in any case are entitled to be given a divorce on a platter! So one should prepare for all the scenarios which are likely to come your way from now until that eventually happens. Read this site and especially important posts to prepare for the journey ahead.
14. Put yours and family members’ phones on call recording mode. Sometimes other side will threaten or lure you with settlement offer etc, so keeping the phones on record mode is highly advised. Most husbands ignore this simple advice when the time is still right, and later when they get slapped with IPC 498A type of cases, they are left with only allegations of extortion by wife/in-laws but no evidence to back it up.
General advice and being prepared
15. Write all events since marriage /engagement and make list of all evidences you have with you.
16. Learn about how to file RTI. When you need it, you can file it quickly. Police will give CAW complaint copy if you file RTI – they won’t give it otherwise.
17. If you fear wife may come to your home and do any drama in front of neighbours etc., then it is strongly advised install a CCTV at front door of house facing outside. This will either mitigate the possibility of a publicly enacted drama in front of your home, or at least give you good evidence to puncture their lies if it does happen.
18. Very important thing to deal with more urgent than 498A: Learn about maintenance under DV Act and CrPC 125. That is almost always done by wives once they file 498A. Interim maintenance may be awarded within 6-9 months of wife filing these cases and if you don’t fight properly she may be given high maintenance by court! Collect wife’s work and income proofs if she was working earlier or is working now. Make sure that your advocate submits all such proofs to court and does arguments before interim order is decided.
For many husbands, CAW cell counselling is one of the first steps they face in the journey of #LegalTerrorism foisted on them. Many husbands are given this false hope by supposed well-wishers, legal experts that CAW cell counselling may be just because of misunderstanding between the couple, “wife only wants her jewellery right now”, “wife has only issue with husband’s parents which will be sorted out once he is ready to take a separate house”, things may get better in time, and so on. But based on the experiences shared by countless husbands, CAW cell counselling is just a beginning to a journey where false allegations, cases may get filed on husband and even his unrelated family members. There is no need to live with false hopes. One reason as to why women resort to CAW cell is that it is a good legal way for them to get their jewellery (if with husband) BEFORE they plan on their next steps of #LegalTerrorism. Taking of jewellery from husband’s house before leaving is a well-known predictor of false cases coming in husband’s way in future.
Finally, I suggest to take this Quiz on CAW Cell/Mahila Thana Procedures and Counselling to cement your understanding of points in this article, and other practical knowledge about how to deal with CAW cells and Mahila Thana as an accused husband.
You can also check all the available quizzes here!
why does the CAW cell or the legal cell files an FIR even when husband have all the documents supporting him, and is it mandatory that an FIR will be filled even if husband proves that allegations are false??
Are there any scenario’s that were CAW closes the charges against husband stating as false, or it will mandatorily go for the FIR?
Adding to this CAW Cell IO asked for 2 Lakh as bribe, she finally settled on demanding 50K, what should i do about it?
Bribing /trying “Setting”/ Chai-Paani / fake obsequiousness for Mai-Baaps is the reason the country is where it is while so many other countries have surpassed us many decades back itself!
All husbands who bribe police/IOs are directly responsible for the misery of all other husbands in the Legal Terrorism unleashed on them. People who have given 50K or even more than 1 lakh haven’t reported any great benefits to them. FIR will happen and bribing is not going to stop it. Some people say that their bribe resulted in their parents’ name being taken out of chargesheet, but if that was so then how do others who don’t bribe can also get the same results, too?
If you want to, you can donate money to the police fund – and ask them to follow procedures as per CrPC etc.
Not applicable for CAW Cell: In some scenarios where wife’s information is not believable at all, police has refused to take FIR too.
But in general, the trend in North India CAW cells is that once a case comes there and not closed to wife’s satisfaction, then she can convert it into FIR any day she wants to, and husband’s evidences of course are ignored. This is the current political (and societal) narrative of the country regarding #WomenProtection and #WomenEmpowerment. Police won’t dismiss complaints, only court will after trial – and hence the very high acquittal rates in IPC 498A etc.
Hello sir,
1. Is admitted, send/by post to letter in CAW,and don’t go to mediation due to heard the abused language and upfrontly IO said to my papa- gives the money and solve the matter, some of things which defined in istridhan, like clothes of husband and family is admitted, is wrong..??
2. If I don’t go like CAW women cell, then wants to or helps you what is next procedure ???
3. Someone says wife commits the things of istridhan, she will proves by court or someone said if she said to badly beaten by husband however court accept without an inquiry or any proof ????
My query is that what is actual true lines – proof it in front of Judge or court or proof it not or just wife said and accept all things in front of Judge or court…???
4. If I don’t doing case when the complete of 1yr date, so automatically divorce is happens or go court and write that mutual consent divorce at that time and wants to know that at the time wife commits money in front of court ???
Or I accept the amount of istridhan, to do pays or more than pays ????
There is no automatic divorce even after 10 years, leave alone 1 year! You can read my book on divorce if you want to. This initial stage is the right time to learn basics of law, else if you keep asking multiple people and make decision based on majority opinion, then it will be all wrong since majority of public does not know even ABC of law! They will only scare you and repeat standard phrases like: “law is in favour of women”, and so on!
Rest of the questions about stridhan, list of items etc are already covered in the article in detail. You can refer to this latest judgment of Delhi HC too, which says that there cannot be arrest of husband only for purpose of recovery of stridhan/articles. And if police or IO harasses you without reason, you can file complaint to your state’s State Human Rights Commission (SHRC).
https://www.diigo.com/item/pdf/6bikj/d1em?k=b503bc4f5e84a37e91d53c401dd49a15
Hello Sir,
My wife and me married one year back and she was not ready to stay along with parents and lots of problem,finally she created lots of quarrel and went delhu from mumbai.now she is in delhi from 5 months and complaint in caw cell and i went there from mumbai fot councelling and they were try to pressure me like FIR will be filled n all and all and again they have called me..so can you suggest should i try to file any complaint in mumbai as well. And do i file petition in mumbai or i shud do all the procedure in delhi..and also customary divorce can be done in CAW cell or it is not option . Please help me as she had file wromg allegationike dowry , harrassment on me n my family so how we shud proceed further in this case
What complaint can you file in Mumbai? What petition? What is customary divorce? It’s just random questions.
Let them file FIR – that is going to happen anyway if you don’t fall at wife’s feet and agree to all her demands.
All info on handling CAW cell is already given in this article. Go through article, important posts, quiz on 498A, CAW cell etc. Join groups to discuss further.
Hi Sir,
I am a bisexual guy and got married on 18th Nov. I was in a dillema abt my sexual orientation as to should i deny for marriage and tell evrything to my parents but due to courage i decided to tell my fiance about it thinking she would call off this marriage as she seeemed to be understanding enough. In Oct 2018 i met her personally at her hometown with one of my straight friends who knws abe me and told her evrything and asked her to forgive me and deny for marriage as i can’t tell me parents but she gained sympathy as her sister is also sitting home after marriage (tried to kill her husband which we got to knw later) and made me trust that she is ok and understands me and after marriage evrything will be fine. Later, in dec after our honeymoon she started complaining her parents and my parents that i don’t love her the way the husband does and started fighting. Until now i was not aware of her plannings i used to do nite shift and one day when i woke up her father and uncles were at my house and she captured my phone, laptop and personal diary and handed over to them and told them evrything and to my parents too. My parents asked me to be with her as husband but i was not able to be as this all was happened and i completely lost my trust care love i used to do her. After thier parents asked me to leave the job and city and move back to my hometown i did.. because i know wht she was doing i asked my parents to install CCTV cameras so she cannot put any allegations for domestic violence and such things. On 20th Feb she forcefully removed those cameras which we do have footage and then called police telling them that we beat her and abuse her and telling tham that i am gay.. On 25th Feb she again call police and when police asked to call her parents as they did knw she was lying she managed to create a suicidal scene and posted her videos on social media. We admited her to hospital under police custody and now we have a complaint filed on 17th May 2019 about me being gay (i am bisexual) and beating and abusing her as she did not fullfill our dowry demands of 10lac cash and a fortuner.
For dowry allegations, you have to fight based on evidence (or argue about lack of it).
Police is not believing her story, so that shows that the criminal case is very weak.
Since you told her before marriage about being bisexual (hope you have some proof of visit to her city and that friend accompanying you), she can’t claim that it was hidden. But sympathy may not be expected from legal system esp because people will judge a bisexual to have dual options, it will have to be fought properly. Check history of the family esp her sister’s case.
She had access of my phone and gmail account as there was nothing to hide.. She mighg have my pictures with my partner or may be videos. My lawyer is filing an RCR and am not sure will that help. She has filed domestic violence, dowry and interim maintainece case against me. We have already given her the jewelery but she denied all that in Women cell and said she destroyed cameras because we asked her to do it. What should we do.
Filing RCR is an old favourite technique of both advocates and unsophisticated clients which is supposed to get a husband bail easily, reduce maintenance etc – except it doesn’t work! In fact, filing RCR can lead to judge awarding higher maintenance since it’s normal to assume such a “loving husband” will not mind paying a few thousand extra to his beloved wife! It probably could have worked if wife didn’t file any cases on husband, which is probably why AFTER filing RCR one is usually bombarded with multiple cases, much more than if he hadn’t.
What type of storage options were there in CCTV – local SD card or on a connected server? What is the point of doing so much evidence work, and then humbly prostrating in front of wife to agree to her removing the CCTV and taking it away?
All such females tell the same story in CAW cell that their jewellery is still with husband/in-laws. Nothing new. Learn to stay tough and repeat the same to police that she has taken jewellery already and she destroyed CCTV for the same reason.
Did you get video of her suicide drama? Do you know how to use it in your favour? If you file RCR after all that, it will definitely create the impression that you have something to hide or the fault must be yours. This is what the lawyers don’t tell before filing RCR, they are all blindly following the ‘herd’!
Don’t post any more questions in reply.
I want to be divorce to my wife xxx because he was already sex with yyy I told to her this wrong but she was saying who the hell are you, so please suggest for divorce
we don’t advise on how to get divorce, reasons are here: http://menrightsindia.net/2016/07/i-want-divorce-from-wife-please-help-me.html
sir i need your contact no. want to meet personaly..
plz send me ur no.
not able to meet personally or impersonally(if there is such a thing!), you can join the groups though (see top right green button).
Dear Sir,
I was married in Delhi on 16 May 2010. After one month of my marriage due to disputes between my parents and my wife, my kitchen got separated from my parents and me and my wife along with our kid have been living on third floor of the same house with separate a) kitchen, b) electricity connection, c) gas connection and phone connection. There has been no incident of domestic violence in the last 7.7 years and no MLC has been done. On 07 June 2017, my sister was made to drink harpik by her in laws in gurgaon, due to which she came back to our house. My wife’s parents have always been demanding property from my father. On 29 June 2017 my wife locked herself in the room and kept herself locked for 2 days. We called up police and then in front of police and her parents and other relatives door was opened. Her parents and 12 relative came to our house and demanded property from my father. I again called up police and in front of police she said that she want divorce from me. She left along with her parents. On the next day she lodged a complaint in police station saying that me and my mother were trying to kill her, I was helping my jeeja to molest her. etc. It also has all the ingredients for 498A and 406. A Complaint was also registered in Women Cell, Malviya Nagar. The case was referred for counselling and also to family welfare committee. Everyone, till now has said that we should try and resolve this and should live together. In the meanwhile, she has also filed DV against me, my father, my mother, my both younger sisters and my jeeja in Tis Hazari. First date of the case is on 22 Feb 2018. In DV petitiomn she is asking for Rs. 3 crores as damages and 3,30,000 per month as maintenance. When my wife left me, I was suffering from tinnitus and wasnt even able to walk properly. In January this year my father was operated twice for cancer in urinary bladder.
She has also alleged that her father has spent around 1 crore till now from marriage on me and my wife and that is part of streedhan.
Please help.
My case is with CAW cell Delhi right now and I am to submit my response to the list she brought on the previous date. In the list she wrote her jewelry, marriage expenses, shagun cash envelop details, items exchanged at the time of engagement ring ceremony before marriage. My question is what exactly I have to admit here. Because the items that I truly have are my engagement ring, a pair of shoes and a watch. Do I need to admit to return my engagement ring? Do I admit to return the shoes and watch? There is an online transaction that she might have made in the past and she wrote that too. Do I admit to return that amount too? What should be my statements or reply to this exactly?
Admit things you are aware of, and deny others if you know it to be false, or say you are unaware if it’s not in your knowledge.
Read for details:
menrightsindia.net/2015/01/dowry-stridhan-cruelty-under-498a-marriage-expenses-and-more.html
Sir,
My cousin brother got married 5 years back. he has a 3 years old child. in december last year she filed a dowry and harassment case against her father-in-law also accused him of attempt to rape. Since then whole family is disturbed. She lives at the 2nd floor with her husband and their child. Some days back she said that she wants divorce and demanded a large sum of money (Rs 25 lakh) in return she will withdraw the cases.
During this period she has been very aggressive and she used to leave home frequently without informing her husband. Her behavior was suspicious. She was seen at a hospital with a guy who used to live on rent in the same building. Some days back they both were seen on a bike by a relative of us. He chased them but that guy jumped red light and ran away. After that my brother contacted her asking about where she was. she
said nothing and misbehaved with him and warned him( tujhe toh main ghar aa ke dekhungi) instead. He filed a complaint against the guy in police station. The guy was called by police after he came he was made to call her. after that she appeared in police station. After that day my brother is staying at my relative’s house.
What should my uncle and brother do now?
You will need to fight the dowry harassment case anyway. It’s not clear why brother started staying at relative’s house after complaining to police about the guy etc.
Any evidence about her current boyfriends etc can be useful but she could also claim that she started having new relationship only after dowry harassment and other torture by husband/in-laws etc. Such evidence can be useful to certain extent if used at right time in right way inside court, which most people don’t know how to. It could help in child custody case too but that doesn’t seem to be the question or concern here.
She does not allow him meet his child and frequently warns him of filing false complaints of violence against Him and his family. That’s why in order to be safe he does not live with her.
The guy who she was found with used to live in the same building some 2 years back. That’s much earlier than when she filed False Dowry harassment case. Both had admitted in Police Station that she was willfully going with him.
And of course My cousin Brother will fight for child custody.
Sir what kind of evidences should we collect to come strong?
Please Help
Sir, i have got married on 28/4/17, now my wife filed a complaint against me in CAW cell that i am asking for dowry and domestic violence. when i have got married after 2 or 4 day my wife talking to another guy at late night and messaging him. when i asked her who is he she said he is my lover and i want to marry her but my parents forced fully did my marriage with you. when i asked this thing to her parents they said she’s lieing. after this incident they started fighting with me and put wrong alligation on me and my family members. one day i have notice that she walking like a handicap person, when i asked her why you walking like this she said i have swelling in my toes that why,but few day after she walking like same. then i have decided to go for a check-up to doctor, doctor did a x ray of her and the x ray report came to me, i can’t tell u how i feel that time because doctor said she’s have rod and 5 screws in her right leg in a simple way she’s a handicap.
when i asked her about this why you didn’t tell me this before marriage she said my mother and father forced me to hide that thing from you.
After that she started fight with me and trying many times threatening to commit suicide and locks the door and tries to hang herself. Then i had a complaint on 100 no. against her that she trying to commit suicide in front of me and my parents. then police came but they did noting.
Now i live seperately alone in other place on rent, misfortune my relative death i went their for few days and when i came back i saw that she with her parents and help of key maker man she took all belongings from the house.And now in CAW cell I.O. gave me a list of articles of her and ask me to you also make a list of articles of her. But she already take the whole thing from the house now which list should i give to I.O.
Please help me to out from this mess..
>>complaint on 100 no. against her that she trying
They give a docket number when you call. File RTI on police wireless department and get a transcript or whatever record/document you have of this PCR call.
You will have to deal with CAW cell/stridhan list etc like everyone else. However there is one strong thing in your case which is a medically provable instance of fraud/hiding of information about wife before marriage (xray report). So you can file for annulment of marriage. Now most lawyers will suggest to financially settle/give mutual divorce to wife, because they themselves don’t have any experience or confidence fighting based on law; so that’s something you have to manage yourselves by just telling the lawyer to follow your own strategy.
Hi Sir, My brother go married in last year July. she is our relative also. We didn’t know her nature before. from the very next day of marriage she is started fighting my brother, she is very suspicious nature. Simply she is torturing him even if he comes home around 7PM also but those words are very filthy in nature, we cant hear as well. Main issue is she is always threatening to commit suicide and locks the door and tries to hang herself or pierce her hand with bangles etc., So, we had even informed them regarding her nature. They admitted that she does in her parental home like that. Between in Jan’17 one small function was there. On that day her brother and her family people fought with us and destroyed our thinks and so many arguments etc. happened. Then we filed a case in the local police station. They asked them to come for enquiry but they refused to come saying let them file case we will put dowry case like that. Then that case is still pending.
Now she has 3months old kid. She is threatening to pour complete bottle of syrup into baby’s mouth and kill, then will kill myself. will leave a death note mentioning all of you. in my home two of us are govt. employees. So they are saying that they will file dowry case and disturb our job etc.,
Dowry thing is not there. Her nature itself being quarrelsome. My brother is disturbed a lot. Mental torture always. In a day 4-5 times she is doing. Always fighting with my brother, if others asks she says no problem between us(if his sister leaves the house I will not fight — my sister is married and husband not taking care – hence she is at my home.)
On chain of fights last week one day my brother got upset and stopped coming to home but he was in the village only. After three days she called her brother and told him to remove the fuse carrier from our bore-well connection as my brother was sleeping in that room. So he broken the lock and did the same. Very next day they approached one uncle in my place for settling down the issue. Hence we told ask them to bring 4-5 elders and we will call our people also and discuss. Since he was mediating my brother slept in that uncle house’ terrace room. She informed her brother reg this hence he drunk and came and beaten my brother.
Please advice how to handle this.
There is no generic advice how to handle.
Keep pursuing your old complaint to PS and keep copies of it. That’s very important proof of you having filed a complaint before wife did.
Secondly, if any beating/threat from other side complaint to PS is a must immediately. Even if you wait for few days police will ignore husband’s complaint. Send it by speed post to SP or higher authorities in police if local PS doesn’t accept, which they often don’t.
Inspite of she starting fight from second day of marriage, your brother decided to have a child, probably going by the conventional ‘wisdom’ that wife will improve behaviour after having a child. Now it gets even more complicated.
>>if he comes home around 7PM also but those words are very filthy in nature, we cant hear as well.
Can you at least start recording such incidents, even if you can’t hear. Without evidence, it’s very difficult for husband to fight it later on in court etc.
Hello,
I was married in 15Jan2017. My inlaws are very aggressive and Prudy. They filed a case of dowry and torches against me in women cell. In second counseling. I was agree to live with her.
Now she is living with me since last three weeks but they are not closing the case. I am not sure what I can do.
They are trying to blame on my mother again and again even if she have not meet or talk to her since last 5 months. My next hearing is after a week in front of my DSP women cell and they are asking to take my mother with me there.
What will happen if I don’t went there. I don’t want to involve my mother in this mess.
Please Help.
These cases are not meant to be closed. You will always remain more of accused than husband in eyes of law as long as wife chooses it to be.
Women cell can’t force anyone to come. They can file FIR at max. Read latest SC Jul 2017 judgment and ask for case to be sent to family welfare committee of your district instead of CAW cell.
Hi i married 10 months back to my wife… since very beginning she did not understand her role as a married woman and also her parents. she always annoy and fight with me on small issues daily. Now situation is much worse. in fact she wants my separation from my family and also wants me to help her father financially. when i refused she said i will put false dowry and domestic violence case against me. one week before my in-laws without informing came to my house and violently beaten me and my family members. after 4 days she filed her complaint in CAW cell ghaziabad and i m asked to go there after 10 days. however i made complaint in writing on the very next day of the incident to DCP, CP, human right commission and local police station. i m fearful of CAW cell. Please advice me…..
Thanks
Making complaint to police etc was the right step, now you have to follow up with those and make sure it gets converted to FIR. And read articles and some basic guidelines as given on this site. There is no straight formula or painkiller which can take the troubles away.
Sir I got married last year and my in laws had throw me out of their house .. And it is not first time it is 3red time . their issues are so strange like 7 ‘o clock uthti hai chura ni pehnti n many more like this. .. They every time threatened me that they will re marry their son without giving me divorce . a police complaint was made against them earlier and the officer had resolved the matter .my in laws gave him a statement that I they will not expel me out of their house and again did that. .. Please sir tell me what I have to do
You went to police and they resolved it, so probably the complaint was found to be without merit, because normally filing FIR is not that difficult.
I was married on16 April2016,after one year my husband and in-laws alleged that I talks with my school time friend,and made a consipericy with Delhi police and thrown me out of my matrimonial home bare handed.All my dowery items, jewelry and other satridhan items are with them.I filed a complaint in CAW cell.After 3 counsellings at caw cell the matter is with DSP and he has been managed by my in-laws and he is not sending the case after verification.kindly help me what should I do?
If you have proof that DSP and others are all under ‘management’ of in-laws, you can complain to higher police. CAW process can take few months anyway, and everything in police doesn’t happen as per complainant’s wishes.
My case is totally different as my inlaws used to take money from me and fortunately I gave most of them through check.i was in africa at the time of marriage and after 4 month of rejoining I bought her there with me..my wife is living with her parents for last 20 month and she went to caw cell and file all false case like dowry and all.I wrote in my first application that my answer is same as one year before that she can come and will live with us in himachal as my dad is very old and he need someone to look after him but she denied as she want to do job in Delhi.before 3rd meeting I came to know about her false story and then I wrote I want justice now.now they asked for list of articles in next date
Lose your illusions that your case is special, and others are dowry-seekers. Many people have given money to in-laws, it’s ignored by police routinely.
The CAW cell and stridhan/dowry routine has started, there is no escape from this except to stick to your stand and facts as you know them.
3months back I married it’s arrange marriage as Hindu,the girls had a skin analysis problem we can’t sleep together it’s cruel n not comfort to see the body only however can’t continue in sexual level. Now thier parents are demanding by phone money n maintenance. They cheated me without informing like she had a skin problems n all. Now they r mentally torchering to me n my family . Is thier any potion I can lodge a complaint against my wife n thier family???
At maximum you can file for annulment of marriage citing fraud. We don’t get involved in guiding people on divorce/annulment etc, so suggest to read this book:
Guide for Men on Divorce, Cruelty, Desertion, Annulment (only in Kindle Edition)
My brother wife complaint in women’s Police station.she said my brother took her gold and runaway.2 months before my brother’s wife’s parents came to my brother house.they said they want money 60 thousand rupees for treatment of his wife.we said she have mild shoulder pain.doctor told like that.but her parents refuse to listen.they said doctor telling lies.we need money to take another hospital.my brother said I have no money now.My wife have her gold u sold and give money to my wife.but her parents said my son have marriage we don’t want to sell.this all is we have voice recording.is it voice recording useful in women police station
Voice recording may be useful but in our glorious PS seem to have a mandate to ignore all evidence against wife/in-laws… so don’t have high hopes there but if it works, then well and good. Else keep it for trial if that time comes.
I’m married in 22nd april 2016. During marriage my in law argue with us in marriage for silly reason, after that my wife and me were just friends instead of husband wife till one month.after that everything is normal we feel, but again after 20 days every time she used to goto her parental home and come to our home after arguements only.this happened twice before one major incident took place she filed false NC against my parents about torture and take her all jwellery before she moved to her parental home, she moved to her parental home had some heated arguements later on we had meeting with our relatives and finally agreed to give her one more chance for our relationship. I had all her audio records to prove it is false NC but we forgive her and her father taken back their NC sametime we also withdraw cross NC filed against them .but after 3 days returning to our home she started same thing about doing some dramas and rumoous to all our relatives that we are torchuring to her we asked and discussed her reason for it but she lie everytime. Now she moved to her parental home 4 months back threatened us we torture her for dowry (I have recorded this conversation) now we asked to filed case against us i.e. proved we have tortured you and asked for dowry. because we know we treat he very well. till date she never accept any mistake done by her and we are forgive her for our relations and prestige in society. as well as my wife also know we have all evidence still she doing all these things because we forgive her everytime, these people thinking law is to protect woman and doing vilification of my parents and about me also till date. there are so many false actions by my wife and in laws done till date but these are the major incident I have highighted, please suggest.
Can I file FIR aginst because I have evidence about previous false NC and all false action by my wife and in laws. Now threatening by these people to us about dowry and torture done by family members.
>>Can I file FIR aginst because I have evidence about previous false NC and all false action by my wife and in laws.
You can try reading IPC and anyway even otherwise complain to police but false NC by wife etc against husband is considered least important by police. And since you forgive her everytime, so they also want to continue with their drama.
thanks for reply .. I will read IPC so I can get some solution ..
PLEASE HELP ME !!
my brother got marriage last year feb. After that brother’s wife demand money to my brother for her family approx 5times. Last time she demand money 2 lac for her family, and my brother refuse it again n again. Due to this my brother’s in laws pressure on my brother and my family and told that i will file case against all of you. My brother and my father both are government employee. So that we are very much afaired . My brother’s in-laws abused my brother and mom and dad. They also thereated us to kill of you.
>>government employee. So that we are very much afaired .
Or if you were working in private job/MNC, then people say: “I am afraid to lose my job, and how will I get a new job?”. Fear is a common thing for everyone, reasons are different. It won’t get you any sympathy in the System, so better appear to be confident about the whole situation.
>>My brother’s in-laws abused my brother and mom and dad. They also thereated us to kill of you.
Any recordings taken? Most probably not… usually I have seen wives will take 1-2 recordings with pre-planning, but husbands don’t take anything even after multiple incidents.
Since brother has been paying, where is the question of false dowry case, your brother should be one filing cases if the law existed for men. But anyway, use that as evidence as and when time comes.
Main problem is having confidence and courage in such situations, which most Indians lack
Guyz i am a little confused, kindly suggest me
i got married on 1/12/2011 and we stayed together for 2-3 months the one day she called her brother and went to her parental home with him after trying for 5-6 months she agreed that we should give it another shot and we moved to dwarka where she stayed only for 2 months and on 28/09/2012 she again went to her parental home and is staying there since. Now we have been living separately for almost 3 years around two months back she filled a complaint in women cell.
what i want to know is what happens now as she has been living there with her own wish
Hi pankaj, Is this deliberately done before completing 3 years? Since you had a 3 yr long time of living separately, did that helped you in anyway (CAW, police, court)?
hi,
after 3 years of sucessful marriage,i dont know why my wife left me..she took away all jewellery and also many cloths now she gone from 1 month..i tried many times to convience her but i failed ,,now i got letter from CAW for meeting..how i can online register for RTI?
I got marriage on 30/11/11 after marriage I found this marriage is solemanise on lie. That before marriage they tell me that she is a c.a but she was just 10+2 and working under Ca and she has no interest in house hold work and after 7 months she goes to parental home for routine meeting but she have a mind to never come back afterwards she files fake court cases against me and family domestic violence and sec125 and in courts honable judge suggest us to stay separate from family she lives with me around 8 months but fails and she again said that she is not safe with me and again comes to parental home and court fix 2200 as interim now she file a complaint with women cell in which she agreed to stay with me …. Now what I do stay with her or deny ? I m so much confused pl help I always have same words in every place I want to get her back and stay with her .now it is safe to get her back?
It is not safe at all for you… you are potentially facing a 498a case in near future. Saving maintenance is all very good but saving dignity is worth everything.
Read more at post below. Call and meet up with nearest MRAs:
http://menrightsindia.net/2014/09/advice-to-men-on-498a-maintenance-dv-divorce-child-custody-what-else.html
Hi my wife is criminal mind ans she always said the she’ll go women cell / police station and arrest you and your whole family some she sain this in midnights i tried many times to save my marriage life but she repeted always like she have a contact with lawyers / police and she totally harassing and threnting / mental pressure and many time she try to suside and tell that i already made a sucide note but she clearly tell i dont want divorce so after 1.5 yr of my i file divorse case and now she filed case in women cell / domestic violance / maintance and every where she tell that i want to live with him but my statement always that i want cos she will kill me.. pls advice…